At Fabius Maximus commenter J Allen described the pathetic men he observes in the local grocery store:
The other group were men who were following their wives (this group had wedding rings) like attentive children. They were pushing the cart while the wives grabbed the food. One actually asked his wife for permission to get some peanuts while another asked his wife if it would be a good idea to take the stairs instead of the elevator. This group of men sounded slightly homosexual, but that very well could mean nothing.
Based on his description I strongly suspect these are conservative Christian husbands. This is after all what conservative Christian pastors and other leaders teach. Go to Family Life and you will be taught that God speaks to husbands through their wives’ vaginas. Pick up a book by Pastor Doug Wilson and you will be taught that God intends for wives to be House Despots, and that “[a husband] should learn to see himself as a guest. He wipes his feet at the door, he eats what is served to him, and he seeks to conform to the pattern established by her”. Similarly, the authors of Every Man’s Marriage explain:
What I’m trying to say is that the “master” defines your rights (and remember again that though we refer to your wife as your “master,” it’s our shorthand for the fact that becoming one with her essence is actually your God-given master). Why? Because you’re called to oneness and her essence sets the terms.
Pastor Tim Bayly makes it even simpler, and merely tells husbands to call their wives lord. All of these examples fit the conservative Christian pattern that I’ve described in previous posts, substituting Chivalry (Courtly Love) for Christianity:
Poets adopted the terminology of feudalism, declaring themselves the vassal of the lady and addressing her as midons (my lord), a sort of code name so that the poet did not have to reveal the lady’s name, but which was flattering by addressing her as his lord.
All of this is quite jarring if you aren’t immersed in modern conservative Christian culture, and therefore aren’t an expert in making excuses for it. For a picture of what this looks like, here is a video starring Pastor Todd Unzicker and his wife.
Pastor Unzicker appears to no longer be actively preaching at The Summit Church in Raleigh-Durham, but from what I can tell he and his wife are still associated with it. Summit Church is lead by Pastor J.D. Greear, the President of the Southern Baptist Convention (SBC).
- Academics understand that chivalry isn’t Christian
- Feminism is the parasitic passenger chivalry longs for.
- Call me unchivalrous.