The erasure of Pastor Saeed occurred sooner than I thought.

In my last post I noted that there was no reference to Pastor Saeed in his wife Naghmeh’s Facebook post yesterday.  However, I now see that Christian Today wrote an article in December about a Dec 16th Facebook post by Naghmeh where she also made no reference to him*: Pastor Saeed Abedini’s wife Naghmeh back on social media, says people musn’t confuse Jesus’ righteousness as their own

I also was surprised to see that she didn’t mention him in her Twitter/Instagram Christmas message:

Merry Christmas from our family to your! I am so thankful to be home with my babies celebrating our Savior’s birth. ❤Love you all! Isaiah 9:6

I also found some more background on the story which makes this all even more bizarre and disturbing.  On Oct 21 she tweeted an instagram update explaining that she would not have any way to communicate with Saeed during the months of November, December, and January because his parents were going to be out of Iran and therefore not able to visit him.  It isn’t clear the exact date she sent the email claiming Saeed was abusing her from prison, but early November seems like the best guess.  Certainly all of these ugly allegations have been made public, and his wife’s astonishing move to erase him from the narrative, occurred during a time where Saeed is fully cut off from communicating with the outside world.  All of this has also occurred during a time that his physical health is deteriorating quickly.  On Oct 14th Naghmeh tweeted:

I spoke with Saeed’s parents today after their prison vistation with Saeed. They continue to be worried about Saeed’s health. They say it is deteriorating quickly. Saeed’s mom reminded me of my testimony in front of the congress (in June of this year) when I said that I did not know in what condition I would receive my husband and [sic] that father of my kids. It is hard hearing of Saeed’s health deteriorating, but today as I prayed I felt calm and peace knowing that God is in control.

*In both cases when the press wrote stories about Naghmeh’s facebook posts that excluded all reference to Saeed, the press stories still made at least some reference to him.  I strongly suspect that Naghmeh will find her press coverage drops off dramatically if she continues to post updates that don’t involve Saeed in one way or another.  She could probably revive their interest in the short term by offering more salacious accusations against her imprisoned husband, but eventually that angle will either become too absurd for even the press to continue covering or simply no longer interesting.  Returning to writing about his suffering and imprisonment would be another way for her to return to the media spotlight, but interest in her husband’s persecution will be hard to revive after accusing him of sexual abuse.  Naghmeh may very well have cut open the golden goose in her quest for attention.

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35 Responses to The erasure of Pastor Saeed occurred sooner than I thought.

  1. cynthia says:

    What if this was nothing more than her preparing for his eventual death? She’s had support (and resources) through this ordeal because of her connection to him, but widow status might see that support dwindle. Who’s going to remember her when he’s gone?

    It might be completely innocent, or it could be highly calculated, but it looks like she’s trying to shift the focus to herself in an attempt to maintain support. Logical but reprehensible, which seems to be the default “stress” behavior of a lot of women.

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  3. enrique says:

    In what universe would/could any of this, that we factually KNOW, be “completely innocent”?

    You sound like the “ya, but even if she DID stab her husband 50 times and drown their children…we have to ask, what was the underlying issue that put her in that position?” Holy Cow. Wow.

  4. bkilbour says:

    All reprehensible behavior is logical. Nagmeh Abedini just so happens to be using an illogical accusation and hopes that no one will notice.

  5. The Jack Russell Terrorist says:

    When Pastor Sayeed gets out of jail, he will be thrown back in jail in the US for abuse, back “child support” payments. He should just go to South America. Seems his wifey has another man lined up for when the divorce happens.

  6. DrTorch says:

    Once again, some of Nagmeh’s posts may be in response to threats made to Pastor Sayeed or her other family members.

    While I agree the comments are problems, we don’t know her true motives, and even if they parallel actions by US women, Nagmeh’s are not usual circumstances for US women, so I believe it’s unfair to speculate on her motives.

  7. PokeSalad says:

    Beria = Bering Sea?

  8. Dalrock says:

    @DrTorch

    Once again, some of Nagmeh’s posts may be in response to threats made to Pastor Sayeed or her other family members.

    I don’t think this theory holds any water. Perhaps she was threatened into making false accusations. I could even see her being threatened into silence. But I don’t see Iran forcing her to go on a social media campaign about how she suffered persecution from Muslims for her Christian faith. I especially don’t see Iran telling her that she must urge other Christians to follow her persecuted lead. Nor do I see Iran forcing her to urge her social media followers to fast and seek the Lord.

    This is nonsense.

  9. Dave says:

    While I agree the comments are problems, we don’t know her true motives, and even if they parallel actions by US women, Nagmeh’s are not usual circumstances for US women, so I believe it’s unfair to speculate on her motives.

    Of course, we should not speculate on her motives, because that is patently unfair. Sometimes, a wife could accuse her suffering husband-pastor, who is being tortured, thousands of miles away, of committing abuse–both sexual and physical. For all you know, she may be using a form of reverse psychology to support her husband. Unusual circumstances, you see.

    You just earned the title “Mangina of the week”.

  10. Whether it’s landing a spacecraft on a moving comet, intellectualizing about the foundations of Western Civilzation, a warrior breathing his last on beaches of Normandy fighting Nazi Fascism, or suffering the fate of a possible martyr for Jesus Christ, weak women cannot help but expose themselves as envious of men who move the world.

  11. cynthia says:

    @enrique

    Innocent is probably the wrong word. “Subconsciously” is closer to the mark. Or perhaps, “hamstering.”

    The sad truth of the matter is, some women do some pretty horrible things without realizing how horrible they are. We react without considering the ethics of what we’re doing, and once negative consequences become apparent, we explain it away. There’s not always intent to harm, even when injury is the outcome. Feminism has largely taken the burden of responsibility away from females; there is no longer any external societal pressure to honestly evaluate one’s motives or behaviors. We’re encouraged to run on pure instinct and fancy it morality. It’s feral, and objectively amoral, but with female solipsism being what it is, she may not understand that what she’s doing is wrong.

    From what I’ve seen, the ability to mentally twist even the worst personal vice into virtue is an innate female quality that men neither share nor understand. To you guys, it all looks pre-meditated and therefore, cynical, but the truth is so much worse. Men generally stop when they know they’re doing wrong; women refuse to even see it in the first place. Not that women lack reason. Men typically evaluate the morality of what they’re about to do or have done based on reason and fact, but women tend rationalize based on emotion, self- evaluate only after the fact and will justify not doing so if they suspect the answer won’t be to their liking. Cynical women are aware of the hamster; most don’t see it until reality forces them to.

    What’s worse, a boy accidentally killing a bird in the back yard and realizing it was the wrong thing to do, or a girl who accidentally kills a bird and then pretends like everything’s fine? Both are wrong, but I’d argue it’s our response to wrong-doing that defines us. I’ll add that in my experience, the little boy tells his parents and his parents make him cook and eat the bird as a lesson in what it means to take a life, while the little girl lies, eventually gets found out, and is never punished because “girls don’t kill things.”

    If this sounds like I’m arguing that some women have unformed moral compasses and an inability to tell right from wrong… I would offer that feminists have done more to disempower and infantilize the female mind (if not actively causing it, then certainly preventing these sorts of inclinations from being socialized out) than the Victorians ever did. Learning to accept guilt is the moral struggle of the female heart. It’s something that is best ground in at an early age by one’s father. That just isn’t happening anymore. Instead we’re getting our cues from other girls and divorced moms and all it does is feed the hamster.

    This woman accusing her husband of abuse while he’s in jail is unforgivable. She’s been empowered by society to act as a fully self-aware individual; she should know better; she is ultimately responsible for her actions; this will bring all manner of misery to her. I feel sorry for her children.

    In regards to why she’s distancing herself, I think there might be more (and less) going on than what some think. None of us really know what’s in her heart, but to me, she seems like a very weak woman who would be well-served by deleting her social media accounts. At the very least, it would help with her anxiety levels.

    Sorry for the long post. I’ll bow out now.

  12. thedeti says:

    The entire progression of Naghmeh Abedini’s public statements looks like evidence of Rollo Tomassi’s War Brides theory.

    http://therationalmale.com/2011/10/03/war-brides/

    Briefly stated, the theory is that women find it easy to move on after the death or incapacitation of a prior mate or lover because they had to in order to survive. Women were often kept by their conquerors for mating.

    All this looks like Naghmeh has left Saeed for dead. Or in her mind she has to treat him as dead so she can go on living life.

    Or, as others have said elsewhere, she has a new man. There’s no evidence of this, and nothing publicly stated. But Naghmeh is attractive enough to attract male interest.

    The only reasons for her abrupt erasure of Saeed from her public life are (1) she’s leaving him for dead because she has no choice, continuing to fight for his freedom is becoming increasingly futile, and he has been so badly injured he’s probably as good as dead anyway (in Naghmeh’s mind); or (2) she’s clearing the way for her to replace Saeed with a new man.

  13. feeriker says:

    Learning to accept guilt is the moral struggle of the female heart. It’s something that is best ground in at an early age by one’s father. That just isn’t happening anymore. Instead we’re getting our cues from other girls and divorced moms and all it does is feed the hamster.

    I won’t go as far as to say that internalizing responsibility or blame is impossible for a woman, but overt admission of it very much is. In my more than half a century of existence on this planet, I have never once heard a women of ANY age ever admit to wrongdoing, especially not to any man. Like hypergamy, this is something that appears to be encoded in female DNA.

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  15. feeriker says:

    thedeti says:
    January 6, 2016 at 4:39 pm

    You’ve nailed it. Whether or not there’s another man in her life, she’s following her hypergamous hardwiring and getting ready to steel herself for life without Saeed.

    A lot of the guys who were POWs in Vietnam for many years were on the receiving end of this, having screwed up their wives’ plans by having the gall to come home alive (if not all in one piece).

  16. A Regular Guy says:

    Regardless of the reason, like thedeti said, “All this looks like Naghmeh has left Saeed for dead.”

    This is infuriating and at the same time, heartbreaking.

  17. Novaseeker says:

    The only reasons for her abrupt erasure of Saeed from her public life are (1) she’s leaving him for dead because she has no choice, continuing to fight for his freedom is becoming increasingly futile, and he has been so badly injured he’s probably as good as dead anyway (in Naghmeh’s mind); or (2) she’s clearing the way for her to replace Saeed with a new man.

    I agree. However, it could also be a mix of the two — that is, she’s leaving him for dead, but wants to continue living life in a more full way, so she needs the cover of abuse to justify leaving him for dead and eventually moving in to a new man. It’s the justification part which ties things together, aided and abetted by the church, as most “moving on” situations by women tend to be (the Erickson case being a notable exception).

  18. enrique says:

    If you know women, there doesn’t have to be a “new man” for this to happen, this is simply the overarching narrative being laid down to “morally” (using the term in progressive context) set the stage to GET A MAN asap, and charge this whole thing off to someone, in whatever way…a free ride on whomever’s meal train.

    The retro-narrative will be, “People are judging me for XYZ…but as I stated even back in late 2015…”

    See. That’s how it works. What difference at this point does it make anyhow?

  19. enrique says:

    “I can’t believe she is shopping in Paris, while her husband…”

    * * “As I said, going even back to 2015…”

    “I can’t believe she is ‘dating’, and he’s super rich”

    * * “As I said, going even back to 2015…”

    “It just seems like a weird time to get boob job, while her husband…”

    * * “As I said, going even back to 2015…”

    Pepper in some motions of her hand to to heart during public speaking/press conferences, and references to “my babies” (not “OUR babies”), and “like so many victims (hand touching heart)”…”as many other like me who were silent about abuse” .

    Whatever the questions about her getting on with life will be, if publicly raised, you can bet she will have a side-ways response (similar to women’s oft used humblebrag)…”If there’s anything I have learned through this, is how STRONG I (actually) am…my friends and support have just been tremendous in helping me find MY voice” (Women like to throw in things like “actually” in the above sentence, to give the listener the impression there was some general, patriarchal consensus that they were weak). Women also know how to use timing, pausing, and inflection to say things like, “MY voice”, to imply that…well, come on, it’s only been HIS voice we’ve been hearing about these last few years.

    It’s TIME FOR ME! Yipee. Women are SO SO SO predictable.

  20. Boxer says:

    What difference at this point does it make anyhow?

    Right. It doesn’t make any difference at all. No one posting on this forum is married to her, and she’s not parading around a new man in public.

    Protip: If she does begin parading around a new man in public, ignore Nag-me and go after him. Remind him that he’s an adulterous pervert who is banging a married woman. This should be useful if he is (as I imagine) pretending to be an observant Protestant. Use the New Testament when you realtalk him, and start realtalking anyone who publicly supports the new relationship, civilly — but mercilessly and with the bible to back it up.

  21. JDG says:

    … explaining that she would not have any way to communicate with Saeed during the months of November, December, and January because his parents were going to be out of Iran and therefore not able to visit him.

    So he was abusing her THROUGH his parents? How does that work?

  22. enrique says:

    It’s called vicarious abuse, and it happens to women all the time. Have you not been paying attention to microaggressions, trigger warnings and TV commercials about soup?

  23. JDG says:

    Use the New Testament when you realtalk him, and start realtalking anyone who publicly supports the new relationship, civilly — but mercilessly and with the bible to back it up.

    Actually, doing this IS an act of mercy. If we love someone who is headed for disaster (and anyone supporting this is partaking in the sin and headed for disaster) we tell them the truth rather than letting them go on their merry way. Then, they will either hate us for it, or turn from their destructive path. Sadly we already know which is the more common choice.

  24. JDG says:

    Have you not been paying attention to microaggressions, trigger warnings and TV commercials about soup?

    So now we even abuse our women with SOUP? Sorry I don’t watch TV and therefore miss all those important PC updates. I’ll try to keep up though. I was recently informed how we beat our wives every time we “bat our eyes” at them though, so I haven’t been completely in the dark..

  25. The Other Jim says:

    @thedeti, ” (2) she’s clearing the way for her to replace Saeed with a new man.”

    This is the most likely scenario. After WWII(& Pre-Roe v. Wade) it wasn’t uncommon for returning soldiers who had been gone for more than 9 months to find that that their wives had given birth to children who weren’t their own. There were a lot of divorces following WWII(as well as many more marriages). The most poignant movie to capture this ugly reality was Stalag 17 from 1953. The character Triz Trzcinski is reading a letter from his wife who has miraculously “found” a child and subtext is undeniable for him and the audience; Listen carefully to the last, “I believe it….” as his voice trails off into despair.

    Triz’ Trzcinski: [after reading letter from home] “I believe it. My wife says, “Darling, you won’t believe it, but I found the most adorable baby on our doorstep and I’ve decided to keep it for our very own. Now you won’t believe it, but it’s got exactly my eyes and nose.” Why does she keep saying I won’t believe it? I believe it! I believe it.”

    Beneath every comedy lay a tragedy. So true…

  26. Is This Thing On? says:

    How strong must this guys faith be? He is probably being tortured more by his wife’s actions than by those of his captors. I assume he knows about her actions anyway. He could probably simply convert to Islam and get out of this whole mess. He would be welcomed into a community that doesn’t give women the right to even testify in court. After what his wife has done to him, that has to be very appealing. I hope this guys reward in heaven is indeed commensurate with his suffering on earth.

  27. Looking Glass says:

    Actually, if she has no contact with him, Pastor Saeed could very likely still be completely clueless about all of this. He might actually not know for a few more months, depending on what information is passed through his Parents. Which might explain some of the timing that’s going on.

  28. PuffyJacket says:

    Protip: If she does begin parading around a new man in public, ignore Nag-me and go after him. Remind him that he’s an adulterous pervert who is banging a married woman.

    A thousand times, no. We have enough “Gilligans” ineffectually shaming male sexual conduct, which is the entirely wrong approach.

    Hit her where it hurts, right in her MMP status. She is clinging to her status as a godly, righteous Christian “good girl”, despite having left her husband to rot in prison based on utterly ridiculous charges. Don’t let her get away with that crap. Call her out on it.

    As for the white-knight chump dumb enough to marry her, let him pay the price when his divorce settlement is inevitably handed out. Which he will undoubtedly deserve for thinking it perfectly okay to leave one’s husband to die based on false abuse charges.

  29. @ PuffyJacket & @ Boxer

    Sin is sin. Naghmeh and a new, hypothetical Beau would both be adulterers. The Pastor that marries them is a wolf in sheep’s clothing and the congregation that admits them in are feminist apostates. They are all fair game.

  30. We don’t have confirmation or even a hint that Nag-me has another man but we have her married off to him and divorced (twice!) already. It may be premature but anyone who has dealt with Divorce cases knows what has probably happened. This is exactly how they behave when they hop on a new pop. We could confirm it easily if we had 30 seconds to sit down with her. Is she giddy and well screwed or does she have the look of a desperate for a man cat lady?

  31. bob k. mando says:

    What if this was nothing more than her preparing for his eventual death? She’s had support (and resources) through this ordeal because of her connection to him, but widow status might see that support dwindle. Who’s going to remember her when he’s gone?

    gosh, i don’t know Cynthia. i mean, who remembers Coretta Scott King or Jackie Kennedy or Eleanor Roosevelt?

    frankly, the only ‘claim to fame’ she HAS is as Saeed’s wife. if she shits that up, the churches won’t have anything to do with her.

    this is not to say that i’m disagreeing with you. women have an amazing ability to take actions which will force the very results that they are OCDing about. so i could easily see this as Nagmeh trying to cloak herself in ‘holiness’ in order to attempt to guilt whatever church(es) she is associated with to continue supporting her due to her ‘dedication to God’.

    but they aren’t supporting her due to her personal witness for Christ, they are supporting her because caring for her is part and parcel with supporting Saeed’s witness. so if it becomes apparent to them that she has betrayed Saeed, and especially if Saeed dies …

    Teresa Earnhardt forcing Dale Jr to leave DEI ( Dale Earnhardt, Incorporated ) because she was “trying to protect her daughter’s ( Junior’s half-sister ) inheritance” and so didn’t want to relinquish +50% control of the company was exactly the same kind of thing. Jr was the only thing of value DEI really had. when Jr left, Teresa was forced to sell ownership to Ganassi, and now there’s nothing left of DEI at all and Teresa has been out of NASCAR for years.

    genius move, Teresa! :thumbsup:

  32. Dragonfly says:

    @thedeti, just wanted to let you know I sent you an email, but not sure if it’s a valid address…

  33. rover77 says:

    my guess is the good pastor has been replaced..I have seen many times where a woman abandons their husband and to justify it they pretend like he never existed

  34. KP says:

    FYI – She did not send an email saying he was abusing her, she sent a private prayer request to a private prayer group and was betrayed by someone in this group and a prominent Christian magazine and therefore had to explain. She never intended any of it to be public. What was done to her by her PRIVATE PRAYER GROUP is incomprehensible and is a prime example of the state of the church in America.
    Luke 18: 6 And the Lord said, Hear what the unjust judge saith.
    7 And shall not God avenge his own elect, which cry day and night unto him, though he bear long with them?
    8 I tell you that he will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?
    9 And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others:

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