The new fifty.

Drudge via Time has picked up Jenny Bahn’s piece at XO Jane 30 Is the New 50: “Old Age” is Killing My Dating Life.  What is fascinating is that while Bahn has stumbled on the painful truth, she still can’t fully connect the dots regarding her own choices.  She can’t see that the young women she is unable to compete against are the younger version of herself.  They don’t want to settle down now, but give them a decade and they will be singing the same song Bahn is singing now, complaining that men don’t want to commit.  What is wrong with men?

It’s this logic that has most of my 30-something guy friends dating girls fresh out of college. Girls who, in my experience, are less impressive, less striving, less volatile, less successful, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated, less powerful, less womanly. They are less, and, to a guy not ready for anything — like most of the guys I have dated in New York — less is more.

A 30-year-old woman is an undertaking…

Now that she has more baggage and is more difficult, she expects more from men than she expected when she was younger and prettier.  Is that too much to ask?

See Also:  Women’s morphing need for male investment.

This entry was posted in Aging Feminists, Weak men screwing feminism up, XO Jane. Bookmark the permalink.

149 Responses to The new fifty.

  1. donalgraeme says:

    Girls who, in my experience, are less impressive, less striving, less volatile, less successful, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated, less powerful, less womanly.

    One of these is not like the others….

  2. Pingback: The new fifty. | Manosphere.com

  3. okrahead says:

    It is interesting to see the things she equates with being more womanly. Were a man to suggest those things are the essence of womanhood he would be labeled a misogynist. Which then begs the question as to whether feminists are the true misogynists.

  4. okrahead says:

    Ms. Bahn may be 30, but if I knew nothing about her save the appearance of her face in the pic that accompanies her rant I would guess her to be over 40. I suspect she’s been ridden hard and put up wet more than once.

  5. Evil Dictator says:

    Only revoking women’s lib will fix this. Otherwise America is doomed, we’ll not survive another 50 years of this.

  6. Centurion says:

    It is so clear to me what the issue is, and I have observed and understood it for years: women don’t know men half as well as they claim. I hold that they don’t know men well at all. The female from the time she enters her mid-teens is all about her. So self-absorbed that men’s thoughts and actions puzzle them. It makes no sense to them why a man wouldn’t want to be dancing attendance on them most of the time. It puzzles them that, once “committed,” he would want to spend a day hunting, reading, watching the game, or doing something wholly selfish for his own pleasure without her. There’s worse: that he would do any of those things without her permit.

    Yes, the female spousal unit gets things like household fix-ups, vehicle maintenance, gardening and fiddling with her computer because those activities serve her pleasure and convenience ultimately.

    It’s my contention that women don’t know or understand us nearly as well as they think. They are too preoccupied with themselves.

  7. armenia4ever says:

    A simple fact of life and biology is that once women hit their 30s, it’s going to become harder.

    Sure, you can pick your career as your main goal, but there will be consequences for that later on once you get older.

    Somehow stating this makes me a misogynist. The fact that Drudge picked this up means this will get ALOT of attention. There is going to be some angry hamster articles coming out soon…

  8. BradA says:

    OT, but you have 3 days to participate: Divorce! The Game

  9. BradA says:

    I didn’t tell it to include the video and that doesn’t seem to work for me. The link is: http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1902488383/divorce-the-game

  10. Centurion says:

    I am married – twice actually – and have had a number of girlfriends here and there, so lots of opportunity to observe and reflect on women over the years. I include sisters and children in my deliberations and draw generalities from my experiences with them all.

    I confess to a great but enjoyable sin. (Yes, all sins are enjoyable.) I mess with them. For example, I shop by myself for clothes. I straighten my own tie, and pluck the strays from my own eyebrows. It drives them nuts as do incorrect comments. It’s essential to know their hot buttons and when to push them and when not to. George Burns was an exemplar.

  11. peregrinejohn says:

    More “powerful”? Really, cupcake? I don’t think you have any notion what the word actually means.

  12. MrB says:

    The exchange in the comment section between David and annebeth is classic. David sounds calm and able to discuss the topic logically while annebeth grows angrier with each post resulting in her use shaming and name calling.

  13. Maunalani says:

    What goes around, comes around.

  14. Boxer says:

    The comments (at the bottom of that inane article) are priceless.

  15. Hey, wait a minute, but Aunt Giggles says women don’t hit the Wall until they’re 50. Or was it 80?

    https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2013/02/27/grannies-gone-wild/

  16. earl says:

    “Girls who, in my experience, are less impressive, less striving, less volatile, less successful, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated, less powerful, less womanly.”

    In her experience the key phrase here…which we all know isn’t the same way guy’s think.

    Most guys want a pretty gal with a pleasant personality who seeks to make them happy and bear his children. Not a co-husband who thinks marriage and dating is a competition.

    The window shut on the harridan…now it is wailing and gnashing of teeth time.

  17. earl says:

    The male equivalent to a woman’s SMV is running backs in the NFL.

  18. myrealitie says:

    On one hand, I do think that women in their late teens and early 20’s get the message that it isn’t the societally appropriate time to settle down until at least mid 20’s, and that is unfortunate. I think this message actually does come partially from men, though. Maybe these men are influenced by the feminist agenda, but most of the men I’ve seen who are in the mindset to settle down find younger than 23 or 24 to be too young. At least in NYC, where this story takes place.
    On the other hand though I have watched women in their late 20’s and early 30’s just keep going with the single party girl thing like it’s never going to end. In my early 20’s, living in NYC, I remember watching a 28 year old girl I knew casually laugh off the interest of one particular guy because she wasn’t looking for anything serious. I remember thinking, “huh”???? The short sightedness of people can be astounding.

  19. Alex is 38. I’m 30. Technically, there are no “people our age.” But I’m starting to feel that a 30-year-old woman might as well be a 40-year-old-man, though infinitely less desirable, culturally speaking.

    At 40, a man is well into hitting his stride, something the guy I’m arguing with is all too aware of, as evidenced when he professes on multiple occasions, “I’m an amazing guy.” “We’re killing it. KILLING IT,” he tells me, while explaining that he’s been caught up in his rapidly expanding architecture firm.

    Alex sees his stock rising. For a man, age brings success, wisdom, and the Hollywood-approved wrinkles of Robert Redford. And, while I too find that my career is on the up, it doesn’t matter, because time, for a woman, is hardly as kind as it is to a man. My career successes, my triumphs as a human being, are trumped by the fact my looks — and my ovaries — have a shelf life. Biology and Sociology 101.

    Ahahaha!

    You smell that?
    http://therationalmale.com/2012/06/04/final-exam-navigating-the-smp/

    That’s what winning smells like.

  20. okrahead says:

    Earl,
    A running back in the NFL? Ray Rice game? Aka the new knockout game? I cease your smv by beating a woman unconscious? I know you meant the age of a running back, but hey, it was right there.

  21. Anonymous Reader says:

    Earl

    The male equivalent to a woman’s SMV is running backs in the NFL.

    Not a bad comparison. Especially given the amount of medical intervention that is generally required to keep RB’s in the game after a while. It ain’t just steroids, either. The amount of intervention women use to keep their SMV up as they approach the wall is not quite as extreme, but it is still real. And at some point it won’t be enough, in either case. The NFL RB has to find another job, the carousel rider…we know all about that.

    And so, for any lurkers, let me make explicit what Earl is saying and I second: women should use their peak SMV to become married, and stay married. Even though their MMV may not yet have peaked. Because this is the best direction not only for women but for men and their children, and thus for the larger civilization. Play to strengths.

  22. M3 says:

    Younger women she says are:
    less volatile, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated…
    as if that’s a bad thing.

    Then she goes on to claim that girls who exhibit that are:
    less impressive, less womanly.

    Here is a creature who is absolutely confused and stupid about her own genders attraction triggers for men.

  23. HawkandRock says:

    “Girls who, in my experience, are less impressive, less striving, less volatile, less successful, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated, less powerful, less womanly. They are less,…”

    When asked what I was looking for in a woman on an online dating site, my requirements were: ‘Be honest, pleasant and fit.’ Pretty much in that order and believe me, I was being completely sincere. That is IT. Not a single one of the above descriptors would be desirable to me save ‘womanly’ and I suspect the author and I have a very different idea of that word’s meaning.

    Show of hands of men here — how many men want a woman who is:

    “striving”
    “volatile”
    “successful” (read: has a b.s. job in HR (or the equivalent) that consumes her focus and energy),
    “intimidating”
    “questioning” (if it means a sense of wonder and curiosity about the world, this is a very good thing. I suspect, however, questioning in ugogrrrrl femspeak means challenging every thought, decision and action your mate makes as a potential extension of the patriarchy)
    “pressing”
    “complex” (read: not intelligent/wise but fickle)
    “damaged”
    “opinionated”
    “powerful”?

    Either we’re all small penis immature losers who can’t handle the challenge of a ‘real’ woman, or women have been tragically misled about what most men are looking for in a mate. Feminism ruins everything is touches including the lives of women.

  24. Vercingetorix says:

    The best is how she clearly states all the reasons why she’s less of a catch, why she’s a burden not a blessing, and then frames it as though men are bad. Unreal.

  25. Centurion says:

    I’m with HawkandRock on this one. Hand up and waving.

  26. Tim says:

    Getting ripped to shreds in the comments. It’s truly a thing of beauty to witness.

  27. Hank Flanders says:

    I’m starting to like this Jenny Bahn lady. There need to be more articles like hers to tell women how it is and not just how they want it to be (although I’m not sure actually sure which one hers is designed to be). I’m also not sure if she’s lamenting the fact that younger women are “less striving, less volatile …less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated…” than their older counter-parts or whether she’s trying to argue that these are somehow bad qualities. It’s interesting that she also throws some falsehoods into the mix with “less impressive,” “less womanly,” and “less intimidating.” I’m typically more impressed and intimated by a beautiful young womanly hottie than I am one who is past her physical prime. Aren’t most men? Finally, she throws in some completely irrelevant traits like “less powerful” and “less successful,” as if men even care one way or the other about these things.

  28. Anonymous Reader says:

    Put on The Glasses / view through Red Pill aided vision, and see her list of qualifications for what they really are. She is listing things that women find attractive about men. And because she’s brainwashed with the false notion that men and women are exactly the same except women have babies she naturally projects her own unconscious attractors onto men – “this is what I want, so they must want it, too”.

    Her actual complaint should not be with men. It should be with feminism, because she’s been sold a big, fat, whopping lie as truth.

  29. earl says:

    “Either we’re all small penis immature losers who can’t handle the challenge of a ‘real’ woman, or women have been tragically misled about what most men are looking for in a mate.”

    Well all the things she describes which she thinks should be attractive would be masculine traits. Males can admire other males who are tough, hardened, and like competition but we prefer our women to not be like that which makes them attractive. As far as a woman who has those traits…that’s not a real woman at all.

    So either she wants a small dicked fruity guy to easily abuse or has no clue how the world and her gender works.

  30. Entropy is my god says:

    This is the beginning of glory. This is the beginning of justice.

    Revelation 18:7

    How much she hath glorified herself, and lived deliciously, so much torment and sorrow give her: for she saith in her heart, I sit a queen, and am no widow, and shall see no sorrow.

    There is no sympathy, only laughter.

  31. In the words of the great Indiana Jones, “it’s not the years, it’s the mileage.”

  32. earl says:

    Which sounds more like music to men’s ears?

    A less experienced woman willing to learn.
    Or a VERY experienced woman telling you what to do.

  33. A woman’s brain is not configured for introspection.

    It’s configured for survival by any means necessary, mainly by leeching the resources of men. Subsequently, she will always conclude that any lack on her part must be the fault of a man.

    It’s also not configured for objective conclusions, because every woman ever born somehow feels, that on a planet of seven billion, with 3.5 billion or so of those inhabitants being female as she is, that somehow she is special. No rules apply to her, and her body/charms/feminine wiles are clearly superior to any and all other females, therefore she cannot understand why she doesn’t constantly have her pick of men.

    After all, she reasons, men are just dumb sacks of flesh that are designed to be workhorses, and men will do anything for access to her body, so that formula ought to work at any point in her life, right?

    And at any point there is danger, she expects these same male fleshsacks to sacrifice life and limb to protect her and her brood. Even if her brood is another man’s seed. Why should she care which bag of nuts croaks, as long as she survives?

    You can see from all of this why God told women to submit.

    They’d be lost without us, and dead within a fortnight, and wouldn’t even understand why.

  34. Jakeithus says:

    Hank,

    The falsehoods you point out indicate to me that Ms. Bahn clearly was indicating that “less striving, less volatile, less questioning, less pressing, less damages, less opinionated” are all negative traits. In the feminist mindset, having those traits makes one more impressive and womanly, but this is completely foreign to the way that most men think. They bought the lie that woman are justified in their volatility, complexity, pressing natures, and damage, and that men should celebrate these traits. It is not their responsibility to avoid damage, it is man’s responsibility to suck it up and deal with it. The fact that men would rather seek out the women who have managed to avoid damage (those who protect themselves and marry young), is just another way to attack men.

  35. mikediver5 says:

    Proof positive of this was the Survivor season where they made one tribe all women and one tribe all men. Then men had a shelter, fire, and food and water. The women eventually had to come beg the men for everything because they were sitting on the beach with the colthes they came with and nothing else accomplished. As in our long, and evolutionary basis, hunter gatherer phase; a woman without a man was soon a dead woman, while a man was fine without a woman. Those fish need those bicycles but the bicycles definitely don’t need the fish.

  36. JDG says:

    I haven’t read the comments yet, so I apologize for repeating what someone else has already stated.

    This is a perfect example of my previous acknowledgement (on another thread) of the fact that most women and 99.99% of female feminists do not understand that men think and desire different things than women. My remarks below are meant in the same context that Miss Bahn is using (modern women). And for lurking feminists, yes I used Miss (and go make me a sammich).

    It’s this logic that has most of my 30-something guy friends dating girls fresh out of college. Girls who, in my experience, are:

    less impressive, – incorrect, older women are less impressive (when they are of the type being discussed here).

    less striving, – incorrect, older women are less striving (but they may be more conniving).

    less volatile, – a plus for the younger model (how can even a feminist think being more unpredictable for the worse is a plus?).

    less successful, – a plus for the younger model (why would a man want to compete at home too?).

    less intimidating, – a plus for the younger model (intimidating is a huge red flag).

    less questioning, – a plus for the younger model (what man wants to be second guessed?).

    less pressing, – a plus for the younger model (who wants to be nagged?).

    less complex, – a plus for the younger model (less baggage is better).

    less damaged, – did she really insinuate that less damage is worse than more damage?

    less opinionated, a plus for the younger model (lol … seriously? Men want their women to be opinionated?).

    less powerful, a plus for the younger model (a woman with power is another huge red flag).

    less womanly – what??? what does this even mean when written by a strong
    independent slut sexually empowered woman?

    They are less, and, to a guy not ready for anything — like most of the guys I have dated in New York — less is more.

    She is completely clueless about what men want or need, and in no way imaginable is she (or any like her) wife material.

  37. JDG says:

    Were a man to suggest those things are the essence of womanhood he would be labeled a misogynist.

    I wouldn’t want the things she seems to be implying make for a better woman. I took great care in weeding out these “qualities” from potential candidates.

  38. JDG says:

    She can secure a man who normally would be out of her league, just by being one of the few women willing to give him her prime.

    It really is that simple, yet the obvious is completely missed by the majority of the population.

  39. Jakeithus says:

    JDG,

    I think she did insinuate that less damage is worse than more damage. I think in the case of the traits that to almost any right thinking person are undeniably a negative no matter how you look at them (volatility, complexity/baggage, and damage), the rationalization hamster can go one of three ways:

    1. All women are or will become volatile, filled with baggage and damaged. Men are deluding themselves if they think they can avoid these things by looking for someone younger, so they might as well put up with her damage now rather than put up with someone else’s damage down the road.
    2. The fact a woman might be damaged and volatile is not her fault. Her choices and decisions are not important; she’s really just a victim. “Good Men” should recognize this and overlook it. This is compounded by the fact that men were the ones who likely created this damage in the first place, so men owe it to her to make amends.
    3. A complex, damaged and volatile man might give her the tingles, and because feminism is so certain in its claim that men and women are really just the same, men should be attracted to the same thing that women are. It ties in to why she believes men should find her attractive because she is opinionated and intimidating.

    The alternative is to admit that one made bad life choices that has left them less attractive than those who have made less damaging choices, and I don’t see that happening in the majority of cases.

  40. JDG says:

    They bought the lie that woman are justified in their volatility, complexity, pressing natures, and damage, and that men should celebrate these traits.

    This, and to the extreme that they believe that men actually find these traits desirable in a woman. Further, they don’t realize (and probably wouldn’t care if they did) that many of these traits are destructive to a marriage.

  41. Anonymous Reader says:

    2. The fact a woman might be damaged and volatile is not her fault. Her choices and decisions are not important; she’s really just a victim. “Good Men” should recognize this and overlook it. This is compounded by the fact that men were the ones who likely created this damage in the first place, so men owe it to her to make amends.

    This one, right here, is very popular. Because she gets to make any choices she wants, and blame the results on someone else. Sure, all people like to blame-shift, not everyone gets away with it. The modern social setup actually rewards girls and women for blame shifting, while punishing boys and men who even attempt it. As evidence I can point to just about any LIfetime Special Movie, Oxygen programming, and indeed the article referenced in the original posting.

    Oh, and by the way, a shorter form of #2 above? “ManUP and marry a slut!”.

  42. zodak says:

    sweet sweet schadenfreude *cackles with glee*

  43. JDG says:

    Jakeithus says:
    September 23, 2014 at 3:12 pm

    Yikes! It actually makes sense in a freakish sort of way. I feel bad for her and women like that, but in no way would I encourage anyone to sign on for a partnership between her (or any of her peers) and the state.

  44. myrealitie says:

    I have a question for Rollo if he is still reading:
    I have read your SMP exam piece in the past, and I generally agree with it. If a man does remain single into his mid to late 30’s and continues to invest in himself, I agree that he’ll gravitate successfully towards women in their early 20’s because they are the most attractive women he can attract. This a dominant trend, agreed.
    That said, I have also noticed that the men who are most inclined to behave this way repeatedly (womanizing, like the man in the this post’s article) are the men who are were particularly unsuccessful with women earlier in their lives. All men want to be with very attractive women, but for a man who was able throughout his teens and 20’s to be with attractive women of his cohort, the zooming in on very young women in a fetishizing way as he ages is much less pronounced. Also, men who have had it easy with women also often marry calm, pleasant, and plain girls well before they reach 38. Or at least this has been my observation.
    So, my question: To what extent, if at all, do you think that validation hunting is part of male preference for large age differences when a man is in his late 30’s and beyond? It is definitely not 0%…

  45. Aservant says:

    What hawkandrock, Anonymous Reader and Jakeithus said………..

  46. My friends were shocked and scandalized the first time I said so out loud, but if I ever marry there’s no way in hell I’m marrying a woman older than 25.

  47. Antirevolutionary says:

    What about women who remain single and virgins into their late 20s? I understand the arguments for early marriage, but I think there are some good somewhat older women left for men in their late 20s and past 30.

  48. jsr says:

    @TFH
    Rollo’s chart ain’t bad, but I’m partial to those with more actual data.
    https://www.whatsyourprice.com/blog/the-cougar-and-cub-dating-study/
    Although, I’m curious what the non-normalized data would show.

  49. Anonymous Reader says:

    What about women who remain single and virgins into their late 20s? I understand the arguments for early marriage, but I think there are some good somewhat older women left for men in their late 20s and past 30.

    Yes, yes, yes, Not Allllll Women Are Like That, thanks, no one here has ever encountered that particular form of squid ink before.

    What about women who are blind from birth, huh? What about women who grew up in the jungles of New Guinea, huh? What about them, huh? Huh?

    Please stick to the topic. The topic is a 30 year old woman who has hit The Wall, who finds that she cannot compete with her younger sisters, because…because…because men are pigs!
    Reality is not conforming to her desires, so some man or men should do something…

  50. Antirevolutionary says:

    I’ve been reading here for a while, and staying on topic is not always a requirement for this comment section. We also have lots of anecdotes here about unusual experiences of people; that’s part of why people are attracted to this community. Admittedly, I am a man with a pretty severe physical disability, so I tend to think in terms of exception.

    In any event, my point is close to the topic. The reaction of most commenters to this essay is to advocate for men to date younger women who are more traditional. Women in their late 20s who have followed Christian sexual morality, but not yet married, are another option. They are also much less “damaged” than the average 30-year-old woman.

  51. magicalpat says:

    I’ve had discussions on this topic with women my age for years.

    They complain about men wanting to date younger women.
    I tell them they have it backwards. It’s women who want to date older men. At least women in their 20’s do. They prefer men in their 30’s and 40’s.

    When I was in my 20’s, many of my dates were with older women. Women my age preferred older men, and older women were flattered that a guy 10 years younger was interested in them. When I ask my female friends if they dated older men in their 20’s, they all say yes.

    I say, well, now it’s my turn. In my 40’s, every date was at least 10 years younger. The 20 something’s who ignored me to date older men when I was in my 20’s now wanted me.

    My female friends agreed that they had set the rules. They just don’t want to live by them when it’s not their turn at bat.

  52. Johnycomelately says:

    I don’t know if this is any cause for celebration, quite the opposite. Sure Jenny is struggling to land the uber Architect Alpha but a woman like her will eventually settle and get married if she wants to.

    This was simply a post about pining for the lost alpha, whether it’s a teenager wailing about a boy pop star or a 30 year old wailing about an uber alpha architect there are no harsh truths revealed.

    What is most revealing about the post is that the female mating preference is in full swing, when women control the marriage market the marry later and Jenny is simply showing this is the case.

    To truly see a change we’d be reading about young women rushing to the altars to get married but this is clearly not the case, Jenny is simply a poster child for AFBB, as Rollo would say she is just going through her epiphany phase.

    Jenny is simply a caricature of fem centric mating patterns not an example of the crashing fem centric mating market.

  53. Robin Munn says:

    Here’s a particular bit of blindness-to-reality in that article, which I haven’t seen anyone mention yet. Notice how she describes the phone conversation in the third paragraph:

    We hadn’t slept together, but the kisses had been the type of kisses you walk away from with shaky knees and blind hope. There was something there, and we both knew it, which is why [we] were attempting to hash things out over the phone at some ungodly hour.

    Emphasis mine (as well as adding in the omitted pronoun in the last sentence). Now take a look at what was really going on:

    Which brings us to the point when he finally — after nearly an hour on the phone explaining that he’s been so hot and cold because he’s too busy with work, because he’s very into expanding his business, because he’s shy — admits he’s been seeing some 20-something girl named Anouk for the past few months.

    Again, emphasis mine.

    Um, Jenny? I hate to be the one to break it to you… but when you said “we” both knew it? You mean that you “knew” it. But he didn’t, hence why he was dating someone else. And it wasn’t “we” that were attempting to hash things out over the phone, it was you. You were desperately clinging, and he was trying to let you down easy, which is why he took an hour trying to brush you off with “polite” excuses. But you wouldn’t take a hint, so he had to drop dating’s equivalent of a nuclear weapon: “I’m seeing someone else.”

    Sheesh. None so blind as those who will not see.

  54. earl says:

    “My female friends agreed that they had set the rules. They just don’t want to live by them when it’s not their turn at bat.”

    Rules are only good when it benefits them…and to be disregarded when they don’t.

  55. Anonymous Reader says:

    Antirevolutionary, if you have read here long enough then surely you have seen more than once in a discussion centering around the bad behavior of some / many women the common reframing attempts such as Men Do That Too as well as NAWALT. Often times a discussion on how women in the modern world make themselves almost totally unfit to marry, someone shows up and insists that there are plenty of 30-something, church going virgins just panting for a man to marry. It is often quite transparently an attempt to divert attention away from the obviously bad behavior of far too many women, and refocus it on men’s imaginary pickiness.

    It isn’t quite a unicorn hunt, but it is close. And I write this as a man who actually does know a few, a very few women over 30 who appear to be low N to 0 N, who for one reason or another are not married. I sympathize with them. Nevertheless, they remain a distinct minority in modern America so far as I can tell. Women like the authoress of the original article referred to, on the other hand, are common — very common – and in more ways than one.

  56. donalgraeme says:

    AR is correct. Women like that exist (I know of a few), but they are exceedingly rare.

    Also, the older a woman is who isn’t married, the more questions that need to be asked. Why isn’t she married at 28? Was it completely out of her control, say because she was involved in a terrible accident? Or was it because she wasn’t prioritizing marriage?

    Every age group of women needs to be vetted carefully, and that particular category is no exception.

  57. greyghost says:

    The cut off age for my advice to young guys is 24. She’s older than that she is strictly booty call or non live in LTR. But never exclusive and damn sure not a wife.

  58. The more I see of this pathetic old maid phenomenon, the more I praise God I got married at 18. With six babies so far, I don’t see them being able to keep up with my level of productivity. Living life as a real woman is fulfilling, as a hamster, not so much.

  59. Maunalani says:

    This article needs to be paired with this one:

    “In Economic Terms, You Are a Depreciating Asset”

    http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2007/10/in_economic_terms_you_are_a_de.html

  60. Casey says:

    “It’s this logic that has most of my 30-something guy friends dating girls fresh out of college. Girls who, in my experience, are less impressive, less striving, less volatile, less successful, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated, less powerful, less womanly. They are less, and, to a guy not ready for anything — like most of the guys I have dated in New York — less is more.”

    “A 30-year-old woman is an undertaking, and it’s the real reason why Alex has been putting me on the backburner for the last two months, telling me I’m amazing and that he’s interested and then disappearing to hang out with a 23-year-old instead. Age ain’t nothing but a number, until it’s a number someone else doesn’t want to deal with.”

    FANTASTIC!!!!
    This article is so myopic, by comparison Mr. Magoo would have 20/20 vision.

    Woman who are (in her opinion) “less impressive, less striving, less volatile, less successful, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated, less powerful”………..and yet, less WOMANLY???

    There you have it: modern women have no idea what an appealing woman would present to a man.

    According to the author, being impressive, striving, volatile, successful, intimidating, questioning, pressing, complex, damaged, opinionated, and powerful are feminine traits that men desire.

    L-A-U-G-H-A-B-L-E

    “Age ain’t nothing but a number, until it’s a number someone else doesn’t want to deal with.”

    And there’s the passive aggressive signoff meant to wag a finger in the general direction of men everywhere.

    She has pissed away her youth, and then pouts that she has to compete with women younger than herself.

    She is reaping what she has sown. She failed herself, no one else has failed her. If anything, she was given what she asked.

    I for one feel this is just desserts.

    I hope she can be impressed with the life she has chosen.

  61. Mark says:

    @Dalrock

    Great find!……I love it!

    I have to say that in my experience in the day to day grind at the office,this is what I see.I constantly hear from women in their 30’s that they cannot find a man.On the 9th Floor(I think) of our office tower there is a “matchmaking” business.About 2 years ago they held a “singles night” one Friday night after work.I never went.But,I heard from the disgusted proprietor that there was over 100 single women….and only 6 men.Six spineless manginas who couldn’t get laid in a whore house with a fistful of one hundred dollar bills.I hope that the 30’s women are getting used to it as it will only get worse for them.At age 49,I find no problem pulling in the 30’s women.They are getting no action and they are willing “booty calls”.

    @Boxer

    “”The comments (at the bottom of that inane article) are priceless.””

    Yes they are.I am still reading them.The Hamster is doing cartwheels.There is some really delusional women posting comments over there.Check out this Canuck babe.Canada’s sexiest woman criminal.She is up on 114 charges.What a prize she is going to be when she hits 30…WOW!
    http://www.sunnewsnetwork.ca/sunnews/canada/archives/2014/09/20140923-133046.html

  62. Jakeithus writes (summing the ‘complicated’ woman’s perspective:

    “1. All women are or will become volatile, filled with baggage and damaged. Men are deluding themselves if they think they can avoid these things by looking for someone younger, so they might as well put up with her damage now rather than put up with someone else’s damage down the road.
    2. The fact a woman might be damaged and volatile is not her fault. Her choices and decisions are not important; she’s really just a victim. “Good Men” should recognize this and overlook it. This is compounded by the fact that men were the ones who likely created this damage in the first place, so men owe it to her to make amends.
    3. A complex, damaged and volatile man might give her the tingles, and because feminism is so certain in its claim that men and women are really just the same, men should be attracted to the same thing that women are. It ties in to why she believes men should find her attractive because she is opinionated and intimidating.”

    –This is astute. I’ve known promiscuous career women who acknowledge their days of innocence with a certain wistfulness, but assume they are entirely the better for having moved beyond that. They imagine themselves to be still the sweet girl inside, but a woman of the world too, and thus a better deal. An old lawyer acquaintance saw herself as Scarlett O’Hara. Considering Rhett’s departing lines to Scarlett (not just “Frankly”, etc., but “the girl you were before the War and poverty . . . “), she could better see, perhaps, how that really wears on a man.

    Among the movies I was taken to see in my very early teens by my early-twenties female cousins (future go-go girls and cult members, God bless) were “The Witches of Eastwick” and “Dangerous Liaisons”. I think they were highly impressed by the moody, sexually experienced women played by the likes of Cher, Sarandon, and Glenn Close. Close herself in interviews seems oddly to think the nihilistic Marquise de Merteuil is the heroine of the piece– liberated and less self-deluded than Valmont, who is semi-redeemed (in a belated and secuarlized context) by the discovery that his life of libertinage had no meaning.

    –In honesty, I’m afraid I was rather impressed by those women too. But that boyish naivete is, I suppose, classical.

    Classical too is the murderous venom of an “experienced” and cynical female for the optimistic and innocent girl.

  63. Johnycomelately says:

    I have no sympathy for older unmarried female virgins that still want to marry, they are the extreme end of the hyperagamy curve.

    Their alpha pining is even worse than sluts, at least sluts are honest about their SMV and will throw a beta a bone.

    No the older female virgin wraps herself with deceit and duplicity, feigning virtue while she passes over the men she should have married all the while pining for what is out of her reach. And boy oh boy do they pine for what they can’t have.

    Even the alphas take a wide birth and avoid sympathy pump and dumps as they can spot a cluster fuck from a mile away.

    She feigns outward morality while internally she is resigned to not playing if she can’t get what she wants.

  64. Kevin says:

    Agree with others – totally clueless about what men find attractive. But…she will find someone to marry her. The world is awash in a sea of blue pill guys waiting to try and make this girl and all the girls in the comments bragging about all their high N and how men should celebrate it happy. There are more than enough blue pill guys for all these women. The real tragedy is how rare a young low N girl looking for marriage is. Feminism has screwed things up for everyone but for guys looking for a young virgin wife interested in marriage – nearly hopeless (or even the 30 year old low N woan looking for marriage). The culture sucks.

  65. elmer says:

    “Anouk”. Sounds like an ethnic name.

  66. Maunalani says:

    Antirevolutionary@6:43 p.m.:

    I agree that virtuous single Christian women in their late twenties and older exist, but, in my experience, running into such women is a rare enough event that when I do it makes a big impression on me. (And here I am talking about the “Real McCoy,” women you can tell are committed, mature Christians and are not just putting on an act.)

    I’ve been long-term married, so am not on the market and haven’t been for quite a while and so am not really in a position to approach these women. But what really amazes me is that although they are often very attractive, both in appearance and in their behavior, they have not been snatched up by someone and frankly probably will continue to be single for quite a while. I can think of one in particular who was in her early thirties and was in charge of the single women’s ministry in my church who was drop-dead gorgeous and a very nice person on top of that. (She did eventually find a guy and get married, although in physical appearance he was nowhere close to her.)

    I think their being committed Christians is a big turn off for the non-Christian guys who would otherwise target them, and I also think a lot of Christian guys are intimidated by them. I also think they have certain attitudes of modesty in dress and behavior that really confuse the wolves, and a lot of guys who would otherwise swoop in don’t know how to make the approach (nor would it likely work). That’s the only way I can explain it.

  67. Gaza says:

    “She can’t see that the young women she is unable to compete against are the younger version of herself.”

    I have yet to meet a woman who can see this in any shape or form. Older women love cheerleading younger women right down the same path of hook-ups, career-building, and/or dream chasing that they took during their salad years, but as soon as they start losing out in the head-to-head for desirable (older) men, the fangs come out and we see that kind of shaming and undermining language that the author attempted with her projection-based rant.

    This has been universal in my experience. Not that long ago, an ex became hostile when attempting to reconnect (because she was between men as is her customary approach) and found out through Facebook (not mine, I don’t play in that cesspool) that I was dating a 23 y/o. I was 36 at the time. Of course, this girl went straight for the age-shaming routine even though her last jockey was 7 years older and I had been 6 years older than her. Crazy.

    I had a wonderful time with the younger woman. We found a lot of common ground and had great alignment of values. She loved how I made her feel safe, how I knew so much about life, how I took care of business but was relaxed and silly, etc. And I loved how she was always so thoughtful and nurturing and kind. Not a bit of anxiety, baggage, or naggage.

    She would have been in it for the long haul but she just had too much of that wanderlust and self-discovery thing going on and I’d seen it too many times to bother taming that mare. So while she was not at all like her older competitor, the cultural tailwind is strong; it drives many of these young women away from what could be a path to happiness and stability for the long run and right down the same one that produces all of these ragged, bitter birds full of heartache and entitlement, desperately clinging to that mirage of themselves and their options.

  68. Lyn87 says:

    “Age ain’t nothing but a number, until it’s a number someone else doesn’t want to deal with.”

    Ah… those pesky numbers. Well I can think of two numbers that most women seem to care about a lot.

    1) The one at Line 37 of the Form 1040 – Adjusted Gross Income.
    2) Height.

    If these women would stop caring about those “just a number” items, they’d probably find plenty of men willing to wife them up. Sure, they’d be mostly short and poor (and damaged from a lifetime of being treated like crap by women – she did say that “damaged” was a bonus, though, didn’t she?), but hey… a man’s income and height are just numbers, right?

    These women are toxic… I’m glad I’m out of that mosh-pit.

  69. Spike says:

    It isn’t just Jenny Bahn. Those of you with some memory might remember the Grammy Award winning song, “Bitch” by Meredith Brooks…

    http://www.vevo.com/…/meredith-brooks/Bitch/USCA39700...

    In the song, she states she’s all of those things that Ms Bahn says in the “less…” list that commentators here have examined so comprehensively it needs no more comment from me.
    Of course, in Ms Brooks’ refrain, she states that you, the man who has made the hideous mistake of loving her, will just have to “Take me as I am, that will make you a stronger man”.
    (Yep. “All those Alphas – I did it for YOU, honey…”)

    The song won a Grammy. It was made popular, unsurprisingly, by women wanting a new Girl Power anthem.

  70. In any event, my point is close to the topic. The reaction of most commenters to this essay is to advocate for men to date younger women who are more traditional. Women in their late 20s who have followed Christian sexual morality, but not yet married, are another option. They are also much less “damaged” than the average 30-year-old woman.

    This has been discussed before, although I don’t recall where (I don’t think it was at Dalrock’s, sorry I don’t remember the venue!) I will just try to sum up what I recollect for you.

    As has already been stated, women who remain virgins into “old” age do exist, but are pretty rare. ANd, as with all women (indeed, all potential spouses), should be vetted carefully. There are simply different concerns to look out for. On the one hand, you may have a woman who is truly committed to chastity, and purity with a future spouse, and eager to lay some love on a husband once she finds him, and has just been REALLY UNLUCKY dating/courting-wise. This was admitted to be possible, but pretty unlikely. It was more likely to be a sign of one of two things (as I recall): either she’s totally frigid, or she has turned her chastity into a virginity obsession. Third option which comes to my mind: she is a “technical” virgin, virgin-in-vagina-only😛

    The “frigidity” case is rather similar to a recent post of Dalrock’s wrt “true love doesn’t wait” – basically, she is able to keep her virginity so late (and through such a hormonal, sexual stage of life) because she has very little or no sex drive, and is a dangerous bet for marriage on account of the fact that she will be less likely to want to fulfill her marital duties. Even if she didn’t start frigid, and was once eager to marry, battling and stamping out her sex drive for so many years could easily leave an indellible mark.

    The viriginity-into-an-idol was also sorta-kinda discussed recently, in the “slutting made her a better Christian” article. Essentially, the girl has devoted so much thought an energy into maintaining her virginity that it becomes a major part of her identity, and transitioning into non-virgin, sexual and willing wife is difficult or impossible: bad marriage material for essentially the same reason, slightly different rationale.

    And the third option (which may have been discussed, I don’t recall) and is probably not what you had in mind, but just to be thorough, is that she is a “virgin” only insomuch as she has never had P-in-V sex, but has done plenty of other things. These are perhaps worse than a regular slut, in that they will likely have all the baggage of a high N, while still claiming the moral high ground.

    A la: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfpVY_ZHGDg

    In any event, there’s still a high risk for 27+ year old women virgins to be pretty damaged, although they may be damaged differently than the high N gals that are their peers. Best bet continues to be a young girl with a low N, ideally 0. Screen carefully, and be aware that there are still risks.

  71. dave1941 says:

    Why marry at 22? When my daughter, now 9, turns 16, I will start working to find her a good husband. My plan is for her to marry at 18 and stay married. It’s like a game where all the other contestants oversleep and she wins by forfeit.

    Marriage 2.0 is extremely risky for men, but then so is coal mining; men will take great risks if they are fairly compensated for it. Instead of a fancy wedding, I intend to offer a dowry, as my guarantee that my daughter will be a faithful wife. For the same reason, I should expect my sons to secure dowries from their prospective fathers-in-law (and I should hold these dowries so they’re not stolen in divorce court).

    If a woman’s family has serious money invested in her marriage, they won’t be so quick to encourage her to divorce. If dowries become common, they could lead to sex-selective abortion, a shortage of female voters, and eventual repeal of misandrist laws.

  72. JDG says:

    redpillsetmefree says:
    September 23, 2014 at 10:52 pm

    Nailed it.

  73. JDG says:

    Also, she sure seems to be able to get Yohami to do her talking for her, and jump through other hoops for her.

    There are some strange goings on here.

  74. Robin Munn says:

    @JDG –

    Wrong thread, I think.

  75. JDG says:

    Robin – Yep! Thanks for the heads up.

  76. JDG says:

    Dalrock could you remove my posts at 11:23 pm and 11:25 pm? Thanks again.

  77. Hank Flanders says:

    Are women still really going for men who are several years older than themselves? I’m in my mid-30s, and if dating sites like OKCupid or Christianmingle can be seen as any kind of indicator whatsoever, it seems that my potential dating pool has shrunk substantially with women age 22 to 26 who list their age limits as no higher than 30 or 32, and even women 27 to 29 will often list that men be only four or five years older than themselves. I’ve even seen single mothers in the 20s listing that the man be no older than 30. Good luck with that (unless she’s just looking to hook up; in that case, she’ll probably get plenty of offers).

  78. Boxer says:

    if dating sites like OKCupid or Christianmingle can be seen as any kind of indicator whatsoever…

    They aren’t any indicator. Women write up those profiles mainly for ego-preservation, not because they’re an accurate reflection of the bottom line.

    The same bitch that projects an air of nitpickiness in her profile will bang you within an hour of meeting, if she’s feeling so inclined, whether or not you meet her self-professed “standards”

  79. DeNihilist says:

    Wow, nice crossover, even the same quote used. Just read this on SS blog, the worm is starting to turn!

    http://stuartschneiderman.blogspot.ca/2014/09/the-feminist-life-plan.html

  80. Bucho says:

    Re: less volatile

    Yeah, because after a long day at work and getting stuck in traffic, I really want a chick who will fly off the handle at the drop of a hat.

    I reckon both Jenny Bahn and Jenny Erickson are drinking from the same pitcher of kool-aid.

  81. Jenny ♥’s Rollo:

    "Sexual Market Value (SMV) for women is ultimately decided by Men." @RationalMale's graph backs up my @TIME piece. http://t.co/Cw1b12RKdz— jenny bahn (@jennybahn) September 24, 2014

  82. Hey, dave1941, good plan.

    Don’t let up on those other good plans though. World Peace, Cats and Dogs laying together, etc.

  83. Opus says:

    It has to be said: she writes better and is better looking than either Pugsley or Erikson, and presumably her article has hit a nerve for it to have been picked-up, as it has. It is (as always) with journalists, worth making oneself the subject of ones article – no chance of factual error or lack of sincerity. It is hard to believe, however, that she is genuinely to be pitied, for most men would be only too happy to date an ex-model, so the idea that either love or sex are in her past is a fanciful notion. It is not as if she is one of those unfortunate women no man has ever wanted to date – so these are tears of a crocodile rather than a clown.

    It does seem, however, if we take her at face value, that she got hit pretty-badly by the Architect who she must have pinned some considerable financial hopes upon, but exactly how Alpha is he? Four dates and only a kiss (even a ground-moving smooch) and then an hour on the phone with some lame excuse about buildings, before revealing the French (as I take her to be) filly, Anouk. Doesn’t sound very Alpha to me.

    I wonder how much she gets paid for her writing. Is it really enough to afford to live as she does in Brooklyn?

  84. I can hardly wait for Aunt Giggles’ twisting in the wind over this.

    But then, she’ll probably claim she invented my SMV graph before I did or some other nonsense.

  85. earl says:

    It is pretty much biology and having kids that determined the SMV. Why there is wailing and gnashing of teeth is that feminists desperately want us to believe their lies. Normal female behavior is having kids when they can and not putting them off until they can’t.

    It’s emotion over logic.

  86. I came across the dynamic seen in the article Dalrock linked as I was reading a recent book, A Colder War by Charles Cumming…..basic spy fiction….here is the quote:

    Ebru knew that she was not beautiful-well, certainly not as beautiful as some of the girls looking for husbands and sugar daddies in Bar Bleu-but she had brains and passion, and men had always responded to those qualities in her

    This is reinforced throughout the book, not just with this woman but with every woman in it. The female the protagonist beds, he thinks to himself how refreshing it is that she has a belly and imperfect thighs but is smart enough to engage him and let him “be real” on issues.

    I know, why did I read it. Because I am still seeking Le Carre’s eventual replacement.

  87. @myreality:

    To what extent, if at all, do you think that validation hunting is part of male preference for large age differences when a man is in his late 30’s and beyond? It is definitely not 0%…

    You’re presuming a truth that isn’t.

    The idea that men “seek validation” for their earned status or to ‘right’ past wrongs to their egos while they were working their way to that status is a social convention the feminine imperative relies on to blunt the painful truth that Jenny Bahn is (to her credit) honestly confronting in her article at 30 and the SMV balance shifts towards enabling men’s capacity to effect their own sexual strategy.

    Have a look at my SMV Graph. Popular culture never presumes women are ‘validation hunting’ when they’re enjoying their peak SMV at 23 and (by order of degree) indulging that opportunity with men while at their peak. Women are “empowered” by their sexuality, and really, no guy who wants to bang a hot 23 year old woman is ever going to rebuke her for it, much less evolve a social convention to limit their odds of doing so.

    However, men enjoying peak SMV in their mid to late 30’s are (by default) presumed to be vindicating themselves and validating their “fragile egos” by the dating younger (in this case an SMV peaked 23 year old no less) women they naturally find more attractive.

    If there is any ‘validation’ for SMV peaked men it’s less about deserving a hot piece of ass or vindication for the women of his peer age who found him sexually invisible until he hit his peak, but rather validation in the self-awareness that he is finally in a position of choosing and qualifying women for his intimacy rather than being filtered for his own acceptability for so long.

    It’s not (usually) that he’s made a conscious effort to make himself an Alpha Agent of Righteous Karma, but that he steps into that role by default when the SMV balance shifts to his favor, and he naturally prefers sexual access to the best physical, and most sexually available woman his newly recognized SMV will afford him.

  88. myrealitie says:

    Rollo, you said that:

    “The idea that men “seek validation” for their earned status or to ‘right’ past wrongs to their egos while they were working their way to that status is a social convention the feminine imperative relies on to blunt the painful truth that Jenny Bahn is (to her credit) honestly confronting in her article at 30 and the SMV balance shifts towards enabling men’s capacity to effect their own sexual strategy.”

    I do think that women choose to use this phenomenon as a way to blunt the painful truth regarding the more dominant phenomenon of SMV dynamics, but I do not agree that it is a completely made up, not at all.

    And while popular culture might not hold that women in their peak SMV years are validation hunting, surely they often are as well! That is why girls coming from loving, in tact homes aren’t typically trying to optimize their SMV so intently, instead perhaps more willingly settling down younger with a closer-in-age mate. It is girls who did not come from loving homes who are more frequently validation hunting, seeking to get with the absolutely highest status guys possible and enjoying juggling them.

    The SM dynamics are still valid. I’m just hypothesizing that not everyone puts all of their energy into fully leveraging their market value. Namely, people with chips on their shoulders.

    Anyway, that is my working hypothesis. Just curious about your view on it. Thanks for the reply.

  89. Here’s a novel idea; men and women enjoy fucking because it feels good, they’re horny for the other and they’re not copulating to impress others or to salve their own egos.

    Justifying all that sexual impulse after the fact might include validation and a host of other rationales, but I don’t think the same mental effort is even a consideration before the act.

  90. myrealitie says:

    With all due respect, I completely disagree with you. I think ego gratification is at least 70% responsible for all human sexual actions. The self plays a HUGE role in sexuality, and sexuality really can’t be reduced to biological horniness or physical pleasure seeking.

    Please ask yourself the following question: What happens to your interest in sex if the hypothetical playmate naked on your bed looks at your penis, tilts her head to the side in astonishment, and says, “but it’s so small!” Are you still interested?

  91. Two questions: How hot is my playmate? How long has it been since I last got laid?

    That may seem facetious but my hindbrain is what’s going to make that decision for me. If she’s an average looking HB5 and I’ve got an HB6 on my ‘possibles’ roster, maybe not.

    If she’s an HB9 and it’s been 6 months since I last had sex, probably so.

    After the fact I might lick my bruised ego’s wounds, but not in the moment.

  92. myrealitie says:

    No, those are fair questions. And I agree that your hindbrain might be making that decision for you in a scarcity situation (it’s been 6 months and she’s one of the few 9’s around). But ego still plays a role as you seem to have acknowledged. It’s not a bad thing, and “ego” isn’t a dirty word. We all have one. But some of us need a lot of external validation to keep ours propped up, or at least that has been my observation. And these are gender neutral comments, btw.

    I guess what made me think of adding this dimension (extent of desire for ego gratification through sex) into the mix of conversation is just that the man in the article probably does fall high on that scale, his living in NYC being the number one tip off to that. But yes, I agree, this is all a side point and not the main show.

  93. Antirevolutionary says:

    thanks for the responses. I agree that the older women virgins need screening, especially for frigidity. The woman I am currently with definitely did not prioritize marriage and worked on her career. She was also quite intimidating at first and my approach was very unique. Still, no woman is perfect, and I do think I’ve found a unicorn. For various reasons, I don’t think most younger women would be interested in me. I also think that marrying an older woman virgin would be almost as helpful to damaging feminism as not marrying at all. Her feminist promiscuous friends and coworkers will see that she is happier in the long run than they are.

  94. That is why girls coming from loving, in tact homes aren’t typically trying to optimize their SMV so intently, instead perhaps more willingly settling down younger with a closer-in-age mate.

    Settling down younger IS optimizing their sexual value. At least a quorum here would agree.

  95. I agree completely with Rollo on ego coming into play after sex. It may , after the fact, boost the ego, help heal the ego, or have some other effect on the ego. To say that ego is part of the genesis of sex is overdone, too over thought by half.

  96. donalgraeme says:

    @ Antirevolutionary

    The woman I am currently with definitely did not prioritize marriage and worked on her career

    What caused her to change her mind? Beware a woman with “baby rabies”, one who is entering what Rollo has called the “epiphany phase” of her life and realizes now is her last chance for marriage and children. That is just asking for trouble.

    What you need to see is serious introspection and repentance over how she wasted the earlier part of her life. Otherwise you are simply walking into a trap.

    For various reasons, I don’t think most younger women would be interested in me.

    Being realistic is not a bad thing, so long as you are still reasonable. Don’t marry her just because other women won’t. Marry her because she is a good choice.

  97. Antirevolutionary says:

    Donalgraeme, I appreciate the advice.
    I think she truly believed that no men would be interested in her. Especially given the fact that she would not marry anyone who did not practice the Catholic faith in a very traditional manner, and young men like that are not numerous in my area. She also thought that starting a good career could be a way to avoid being a burden on her family and even help support younger siblings. It makes sense that if she thinks no one would marry her, why not try for a career that will bring her at least some measure of fulfillment? Without that, if no one was interested in marrying her she could have ended up in an even worse situation.

    Could she have done more to prioritize finding a husband? Possibly by trying to attend more gatherings where men she was interested in might be present, and making an effort to start conversations with them? Or asking her parents to introduce her to young men at their church? We have lived in the same area for quite some time, and we have often talked about what things would be like if we had met earlier. She did say she might not have been ready for a relationship with me, but I may not have been ready either since I converted to Catholicism and was still maturing in the faith.
    Also, while we are happy to have children, since we would not be using birth control, she is likely to be able to have several children in her 30s.
    Overall, since both of us have rather eccentric personalities which match up unusually well, I think things are working out for the best so far, but I know most men may need to follow other advice. I agree with most of what is said on this blog, especially about avoiding women with high N count and the terrible damage that is caused by the feminist culture of divorce. I knew the truth behind that even when I was a boy, when I somehow managed to talk my mother into staying with my father until I was a late teenager.

  98. Milkshake says:

    I can’t really blame her. Our culture tells women that men are free. There’s infinite supply of frustrated chumps at all ages. The hard part for women is that they have to decide on which man to commit to. Oprah, chick lit, Sex and the City, The Rules,… I lost track of how many articles written by middle age women who claim to be a dating dynamos. A 30 something women can spend a year on match.com or e-harmony.com without a single date and still think they have the world by the balls. They can go to a speed date event in a northeast city where women out number men 2 to 1 yet men are so desperate and silly. If man doesn’t call he’s a loser or he’s gay. I know women who think visiting a restaurant with a girlfriends and talking about men is the same as dating. If one women goes on a date, all the women in the group think they jumped in the man pool. Women are told $700 worth of shoes, perfume, lotion, haircut and yoga pants is too much for even hot guys to resist. How can $700 be less than jeans, sneakers and a baseball cap young woman?

  99. kateandluca says:

    Yes over the long hall I agree but one of the reasons modern young women don’t settle down is because they prefer the shorter term excitement of getting the attention of significantly older, very high status men. It’s more fun to be arm candy and feed your ego than to be saddled with babies. Not saying I think it’s smart.

  100. John Nesteutes says:

    I am around impressive, successful (i.e. married with a couple of kids), intelligent, womanly women in their 30s all the time. Many of them are beautiful too.

    They are, however, not “complex”, “damaged”, or “volatile”.

    This is not a problem so much of age but as of a lack of the fruits of age: no maturity, no children, and no husband. These are the things I expect of a woman in her 30s.

  101. Lyn87 says:

    Spot-on, John. Considering what feminists mean when they use the words on that list: impressive, striving, volatile, successful, intimidating, questioning, pressing, complex, damaged, opinionated, powerful, womanly – I would say that it reads like a list of traits to avoid. And while “womanly” is normally a good thing, she’s using it in contrast to what she thinks of as “girlishness.” In other words, she’s not saying “womanly” like a man would understand the term, but rather to convey the idea of worldliness. In other words, someone who rode the carousel and conveniently grew out of it when her ovaries told her to breed.

  102. John Nesteutes says:

    @myrealitie

    “With all due respect, I completely disagree with you. I think ego gratification is at least 70% responsible for all human sexual actions. The self plays a HUGE role in sexuality, and sexuality really can’t be reduced to biological horniness or physical pleasure seeking.”

    This is largely true for women but is not really true for men. Consider that male and female sexuality might be different.

  103. Frugal Nerd says:

    “A 30 year old woman is an undertaking…”

    That statement I can agree with. 30 year old women are experienced enough to have baggage, volatility, complexity, damage, and all the other gifts of Feminism. She then fails to understand that the men she is interested in are going for the younger women because men tend to follow the path of least resistance when it comes to men like water flowing downhill.

    I also love how she doesn’t get how Alex describing her as guarded (read frigid) is him telling her one of his reasons for looking for younger women in the first place. No wonder she didn’t get any action out of him – she probably drove him away with her frigidity.

  104. Frugal Nerd says:

    Meant to say men tend to follow the path of least resistance when it comes to women (not men). I knew I should have proof read before posting.

  105. John Nesteutes says:

    @Frugal Nerd

    Also notice how she has some odd expectation of marital-style monogamy, despite only having gone on several dates, and having no knowledge of what arrangement Alex had with his “other” girlfriend.

  106. John Nesteutes says:

    @Frugal Nerd

    I know a guy around age 30 who is specifically dating a woman who is also 30, despite many girls around 18 or so interested in him, simply because he wants someone closer in age to him for maturity reasons, similar life experiences, doesn’t want to leave behind a widow with 20+ years to go, etc.

    The key difference here is that he’s choosing from women who are not thoroughly de-souled and bernankified. Women in their 30s really aren’t that bad, until we start talking about worldly women who are “complex”, “damaged”, “volatile”, and so forth.

    (Admittedly there are few unmarried women in their 30s in our community to choose from – most of them are married off younger than that.)

  107. myrealitie says:

    If only female sexuality is enhanced by positive ego strokes, then why do men vastly prefer doe-eyed, impressionable women over challenging and bitchy ones, all else (including age and attractiveness) being equal? A favorable self-reflection is part of human sexuality in all cases. I am hypothesizing that this can become perhaps pathological in some people, both men and women, and when it does, it can be responsible for a lot of their bad behavior, including extreme promiscuity and cheating.

    Just chew on it. Allow your perspective to expand to include multiple mechanisms acting simultaneously. These things are not all mutually exclusive.

  108. @myrealitie,

    The self plays a HUGE role in sexuality, and sexuality really can’t be reduced to biological horniness or physical pleasure seeking.

    Have you ever seen “bang my wife” amateur cuckoldry porn?

    Premeditated ego affirmation isn’t the reason Beta-cuckold husbands get off on watching their wives get worked by a ‘bull’ while they look on.

  109. Anonymous Reader says:

    If only female sexuality is enhanced by positive ego strokes, then why do men vastly prefer doe-eyed, impressionable women over challenging and bitchy ones, all else (including age and attractiveness) being equal?

    Because challenging, bitchy women are more like competitors than allies. Because challenging, bitchy women tend to be more like short, angry men with boobs, rather than like women and most men are not interested in tranny sex.

    Because men as a rule do not want to have to endlessly fight with their “helpmeet”.

    Believe it or not, mens’s sexuality is not the same as women’s sexuality.

  110. Frugal Nerd says:

    @John Nesteutes,

    In the case you cite I don’t blame him for avoiding the 18yo crowd due to immaturity – most western 18yo girls are extremely immature. When presented with the choice in the original article (30 vs. 23) then the 23yo will win because chances are better she has some level of maturity without having the Femenist lifestyle irreversibly imprinted on her yet. Were I forced to choose between an 18yo and a 30yo I would want to get to know the women first.

  111. Anonymous Reader says:

    Bonus for myrealitie:
    Women who are challenging and bitchy are contentious.
    Regardless of your religious convictions, take a moment to use an online Bible. Search the book of Proverbs for the word “contentious”. See what you find.
    Here is a hint: the ancient men knew it was better for a man to live in a tent, or on a corner of a flat roof, than in a fancy house with a woman who was contentious.

  112. donalgraeme says:

    @ Antirevolutionary

    Well, it seems like you have both eyes open. I wish you the best.

  113. desiderian says:

    John,

    “I know a guy around age 30 who is specifically dating a woman who is also 30, despite many girls around 18 or so interested in him, simply because he wants someone closer in age to him for maturity reasons, similar life experiences, doesn’t want to leave behind a widow with 20+ years to go, etc.”

    I made a similar choice and am now happily married. Initial interest does not equal sustained interest. The latter requires a level of experience that I had failed to acquire despite being at the height of my SMV and eliminating the bulk of my anti-game. It takes time I no longer had the luxury of.

    “The key difference here is that he’s choosing from women who are not thoroughly de-souled and bernankified. Women in their 30s really aren’t that bad, until we start talking about worldly women who are “complex”, “damaged”, “volatile”, and so forth.”

    She had a repentant spirit to match my own. I had wasted* 20-odd years on blue-pill gamma pride, she 14 married to a lower delta who fulfilled none of his manly duties in marriage, nor she her womanly duty to cultivate his capacity to do so.

    Those years of experience are irrecoverable. The humility engendered by our shared realization of that fact I believe is the secret to the success of our marriage.

    * – not in marriage nor realistically approaching it. As with the many “amazing” women out there, that time was filled with other pursuits. As with those women, it didn’t make me any more attractive as a prospective marriage partner.

  114. Jios says:

    There is no reason for me to commit to one of these 30 something women, the risk is far too great. I just turned 36, own my house outright, and make a slightly above average wage by Australian standards, although I go through periods where I make less, depending on the work available. Why would I want to risk the possibility of losing my house, and perhaps even some of my future inheritance, by hooking up with an ‘age appropriate’ woman who is is no longer in her physical prime and whose fertility window is rapidly closing?

    There is just no valid reason whatsoever, yet I’m constantly shamed for being single and occasionally hooking up with women who are 5-8 years younger. The few women in my mid 30’s that I know are always trying to set me up with their single friends who a similar to the one in this article. They are single, career oriented women who are past their peak SMV, trying desperately hard to hook their claws into any half decent man. These women do not consider me to be the ultimate catch, but they are at the stage of their lives where I’m better than some of the other alternatives. Now that all the alphas have left the station, I’m expected to pick up the tab.

    Forget it!

  115. Andrea Renee says:

    Sir. I am 27 yr old unkissed virgin . I have a great job and lives with my parent as I don’t think a young women should living alone. I have always thought myself not pretty enough get a Godly man — Trafficers will take anyone. I look like I am 18.
    So now I’m almost 30 still virgin( never had sex or kiss another person in a romantic way ), In heat and craving a Godly outlet for sex drive .
    I understand I went to college due to uglyness as protection against provelty. The long and short of it is: I am a horny virgin who wants sex but not sexual sin, what did I do?

  116. JDG says:

    Andrea Renee – Lower your standards (not the biblical ones).

  117. @JDG
    She mentioned twice that she’s ugly. Obviously, being a woman, she wants a guy she has physical desire for (and shouldn’t marry unless she has a great deal of desire for him), but if she hasn’t been a carousel rider that shouldn’t be that terribly difficult.

    @Andrea Renee
    On the slim chance you’re not a troll, improve yourself.

    You say you went to college because you’re ugly and didn’t want to end up in poverty. I’m not a grammar nazi (you may have typed this on your phone) but I hope the degree wasn’t in English.

    There is ugly, but usually there is fat and ugly. Fat doesn’t cost anything to lose, it just takes time and effort. There’s always cosmetic surgery after that. A little nip and tuck to change any issues that seriously impact your face and bumping out the boobs should make a huge change. You say you have a great job and live with your parent, so I assume you should be able to save some money for that.

    While you’re saving your money for the surgery, learn how to talk to men. Be sweet, learn how to ask questions (everybody likes to talk about themselves) and get comfortable saying the magic words that will get a man’s attention:

    “I’m a virgin, I’m really horny and I want to get married and spend the rest of my life having sex as often as I can.”

  118. Andrea Renee says:

    @jdg
    My standard are Low: a godly man over the age -18 and under. 89 who not sell me or our kids in sex market or kill our kids.
    I not asking for a good looking guys, not asking a rich guy. I just a man.

  119. Where are you? Africa?

  120. Andrea Renee says:

    I don’t think I am a troll, I am just tried of getting. “Honey wait on The Lord ” or “he’s out there you’ll see ” from women who Suck ‘n fuck away their twenty. I not need a hot man. Just godly man who enjoy sex . I figure why not ask Godly man what they what as apposite To woman who don’t Even realize that proverbs 31 was written to man . Does that make me troll?

  121. JDG says:

    @JDG
    She mentioned twice that she’s ugly. Obviously, being a woman, she wants a guy she has physical desire for (and shouldn’t marry unless she has a great deal of desire for him), but if she hasn’t been a carousel rider that shouldn’t be that terribly difficult.

    AT – this was my point. There is no shortage of ugly women around these parts, and ALL of them could land a man if they wanted to (most of them have). I know an obese 3 (maybe a 2) who landed a thin 6 (maybe 7). That is unusual, but my point is that when an ugly woman wants a man around here, she gets one. Also, almost always the man’s SMV is 1 or 2 points higher than hers.

    I’ve seen ugly women set their sights way too high, rarely do they hit pay dirt like the above mentioned 3.

    Andrea Renee – I just a man.

    Or a troll. Or you might be using a phone. I hope your using a phone.

  122. Andrea Renee says:

    @ Artisanal Toad i am from the Midwest. I am using my using . Just want a man. I am provably a 2 and I want man 2 or 1.

  123. Andrea Renee says:

    I am using my crap phone. I am not smart or broad enough be a troll

  124. JDG says:

    AT – I just remembered an exception to the trend around here. There is a senior center near by where there are some women in their 50s and 60s who are unwillingly single. One example is an obese woman in her 50s who has a Psychology degree but lives off the government. She often complains about men and the fact that she hasn’t married.

    Even so, a couple of those older women were still able to land “boyfriends”.

  125. Anonymous age 72 says:

    So, Andrea, what is your BMI?

  126. oldfashionedfellow says:

    JDG & Toad: RE: AR: I’ve seen this story too many times before to believe it now. “Ugly?” Even unattractive faces are able to get married at a young age if they’re not fat and are desirous of getting married. They’d have to be realistic, and that’s probably the problem. “I’d take any normal man between the ages of 18 and 89. That’s how sensible I am!” Yeah, sure you are.

    Drawing upon past experience (and poor spelling), I think what we’re facing here is an average faced, overweight girl, with champagne (to be exact, domestic sparkling white wine) tastes on a beer (budweiser) budget. All too predicable.

  127. oldfashionedfellow says:

    Could this be the GBFM in drag? llloozzozlzlzozozlzozlzlzo?

  128. Andrea Renee says:

    Thanks gentlemen,
    1. Lower my standards ( be realistic not stupid)
    2. Learn how to spell.
    3. Don’t ask stupid question.
    3. I don’t need surgery for tits. I’m a 32 DDD( I am not making that up. Vicky secret has new sizes) but I’m looking into dental surgery that should oral more enjoyed for my man.
    But in two years I’m be old to a sex life that involves anything other than toys.
    Last question What are the sexually wants / needs of a man. The one the thing that” godly young woman who want to marry ” site don’t Talk about Thank you guys for help me.
    @At I read post about Revelations it was cool

  129. Lyn87 says:

    Andrea,

    I try to not psychoanalyze people on the internet based on a smattering of comments, and I assume you’re typing on a phone, because you’re not expressing yourself very well… but I think I get the gist of your dilemma.

    Okay… so you’re ugly. That’s tough, but not insurmountable. What matters is in what way you’re ugly. If you’re a “butterface,” you’re not that bad off… guys can look past that if you have an acceptable body. The good news about having an acceptable body is that almost anyone can get one with some work. If your waist-to-hip ratio is greater than 3-to-4, then work to get it there. That may mean eating less and exercising more, but unless you have some debilitating medical condition, it’s only a matter of time and effort on your part. If you start making progress on becoming trim and fit, you’re not going to be a HB2 for very long. If you’re flat-chested, that’s not much of a handicap, either… most men may prefer big-n-bouncy, but few men would put that on their “must-have” list of traits. Do the sorts of exercises that emphasize the feminine form, like aerobics, swimming, and yoga. Light-ish weights are okay, but don’t go for the power-lifter look. Grow your hair out if it’s short – at least shoulder length. If you have teeth like a crocodile, go to an orthodontist and get them fixed. Do not apply make-up with a trowel, but learn to use it sparingly to take the edge off your imperfections – a competent cosmetologist can give you some tips to at least get you started. But that’s just the appearance – society girls used to go to finishing school to learn how to act like ladies, and that’s not among your options, but you can observe women who act in a feminine manner and do what they do. Learn to give off a “feminine vibe.” An internet search for “being more feminine” will yield you some mostly good (and some bad) advice. You can even ask for help. I would do all that before I turned to surgery. Needless to say, you should ignore anything any feminist tells you.

    Finally, be an interesting person. Read worthwhile books, pick up a hobby that you like (not something you’re only doing to appear more interesting), maybe take some dance classes, which will put you in proximity to men – you don’t even have to be good at it – but will help you with moving gracefully.

    That should keep you busy for a while. Good luck… even if you do everything right there are no guarantees, but if a year from now you’re a 28-year-old virgin with long hair, a feminine demeanor, enough style-sense to dress in a way that accentuates your best features, and a 7-to-10 waist-to-hip ratio, I’m fairly confident you could lock down a man within your stated parameters.

  130. Lyn87 says:

    Ah… Andrea was typing the same time I was. 32DDD? Yikes. Obviously you’re not fat. In fact, it sounds like you’re a stick with two volleyballs in your shirt. This is going to be easier than I thought. Big boobs work for you, but the waist-to-hip ratio is more important. You may need to fill out the rest of your body a bit to get there. The rest us of what I wrote is good advice – be feminine, fix your teeth, etc…

  131. @Andrea Renee
    Last question What are the sexually wants / needs of a man.

    Believe it or not, men want more than sex. I’m going to expand on your question a bit, but first I’ll answer directly.

    Don’t say no. You say you want a Godly man. You need to be a Godly woman, which is to say an obedient woman. Reflect on 1st Corinthians 7:4. It says that in marriage, your body belongs to him and you are not to deprive him (refuse to allow him access to your body for sex) except for those times set aside by mutual agreement for fasting and prayer. You have the same rights with respect to him and he is not to say no if you’re horny.

    You say you simply want a man. I think that’s a bad attitude. What you need is a man you can develop some attraction to, because if you’re not attracted to him then it won’t work. However, if you’ve found a guy that’s interested in you and you just want to rip his clothes off, what follows is a little marital advice. If you want a happy husband, practice the Five F’s.

    1) Fight for him. Never, ever let anyone disparage your husband without a response. Never put him down or insult him in public. All marriages are difficult and there will be fights, but those take place in *private.* Never, ever shame him or attack his masculinity in public. In private, be very careful before saying things that hurt. There is an old Italian proverb: the wounds of the knife will heal, but the wounds made with words will never heal.

    2) Follow him. Ephesians 5:22-24. Submit to him, especially in the small things. That will give you far more credibility if there is serious disagreement in the big things. In the end, submit to him in everything, but realize that if you’re doing a good job at submission he will be far, far more likely to listen to your appeal if you are generally submissive.

    3) Fondle him. Women get too hung up on modesty and many forget that he’s their husband. Ya got a set of 36 DDD’s? I guarantee you that if you casually rub your breasts against him, he will be immediately aware of it. That’s a hot-shot to the limbic system. Grab his ass when passing by and wink while scampering away.

    4) Feed him. This encompasses the care and keeping of the home. Meet his needs and give him a sanctuary called “home.” I cannot stress this enough. Men need to focus on their mission, which is (for the most part) providing for the family. There is a huge element in which the man is to actively lead the family, but that can only occur when the wife is actively maintaining the home.

    5) Refer to my comments about not saying no and reflect on what the fifth “F” is. Do I really need to spell it out? Yes, from time to time you’ll give him starfish sex (just laying there) because you don’t have the energy, whatever. However, that needs to be balanced out by at least occasional episodes of screaming, crying, biting, hair-pulling, back-scratching screaming for God sex; after which you lay there thinking “I can’t believe that just happened,” wondering how soon you can get there again.

    If you follow those five points faithfully, you will most likely have a successful marriage. However, I and others could probably give you additional help if you were more specific, so here are a few questions:

    What is your race?
    Who are your people?
    How tall are you and how much do you weigh?
    Do you want children?
    What is your degree in?
    You mentioned oral surgery. Any other issues that might be congenital?
    What particular flavor of Christian are you? (Denomination/sect/whatever)

    Finally, and most important, why on earth if you live in the midwest US are you afraid of human traffickers or a husband killing your children? That’s serious baggage from the sound of it.

  132. oldfashionedfellow says:

    Lyn87: Are you really buying this? 32DDD and she can’t find anybody? Ok, so “she” isn’t fat, has an ample chest, and is under 30. Even if her face isn’t all that, a “butterface,” as you correctly mentioned, should do alright. That means she; 1) has BO that could be used for crowd control; 2) has a disability which she hasn’t shared with us (in which case I would pull back from my criticism, as I think all of us would acknowledge the difficulty of that sort of situation); or 3) has really, really, really inordinately high standards she herself hasn’t recognized, a problem with which none of us could possibly aid her with online. And of course, all of that assumes this isn’t someone with a bone to pick with the manosphere. But, I suppose spreading the message is worth the time spent.

  133. oldfashionedfellow says:

    And I’m sorry but….”traffickers will take anyone,” “sell our kids to a sex market,” “kill our kids.” Com’on! Unless she emigrated from the Sudan, or grew up in a house with really restrictive cult parents who warned her about the roaming sex traffickers of rural Iowa, this really does strain credulity. Moreover, how many Christian women who are never-been-kissed virgins at 27 do you know of, who are free and easy with the phrase “suck n’ f**k,” in casual conversation, or who will concern themselves with orthodontic surgery, chiefly for the purpose of improving their prospective partner’s experience of oral sex? I mean, honestly? You buyin” this?

  134. Lyn87 says:

    OFF,

    I’m starting to not buy it. A 27-year-old slim virgin with DDD’s who can’t get a guy… color me skeptical. Then the up-front sexy-time language… starting to not believe at all.

  135. infowarrior1 says:

    @Andrea Renee

    Even if you do not succeed as result of taking this advice(exercising,eating healthy etc). You will be come much more happier and healthier as a result. Ultimately in the long run what matters is your eternal salvation and your service to God. What you do not have in your current life will be amply compensated in the resurrection.

  136. Lyn87 says:

    OFF,

    Addendum to my last comment. It’s a bit far-fetched, but not impossible. There was a woman in the last church my wife and I used to attend that was about Andrea’s age.

    Drop. Dead. Gorgeous.

    Recovering exercise junkie… very fit. Played the piano in church… very involved with church activities… has a singing voice like a choir of angels… extremely feminine demeanor… dresses modestly… seemed very pious… lived with her mother… and no boyfriend. I’m pretty sure she wasn’t going to date outside the faith (which is wise), and it was a smallish church, so that probably had a lot to do with it. Sometimes it’s just circumstances and timing.

  137. oldfashionedfellow says:

    Lyn87: Regarding that woman in church, if she was all that you say she was, assuming her mother didn’t keep her locked up inside most the year, then she only had herself to blame, for failing to expose herself to the right circumstances at the right time in order to meet a spouse. Again, the fault would be her own for lacking initiative, or for turning down reasonable prospects. Which is the whole point, is it not? This whole manufactured idea of otherwise pretty, thin, feminine, Godly women, who just can’t find a husband. They never tell the whole story, but res ipsa.

  138. @OFF
    She states she’s a “2” on a scale of 1-10. She states she wants MARRIAGE within the context of a Christian marriage. Then she mentions she needs ortho-dental surgery. 32 triple D’s don’t cancel out something like this:

    https://www.google.com/search?q=ortho+congenital+defects&safe=off&biw=1252&bih=582&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=QJsoVPeSAcuHyAT774K4Cw&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAQ#safe=off&tbm=isch&q=orthodontic+congenital+defects&imgdii=_

    Any view of my posting history will convince you that I’m not white-knighting, but honestly some people got dealt a hand that wasn’t so good. Benefit of the doubt and all that, I’m waiting on the responses to the questions I asked.

    Unless she posts a pic, there’s no way to offer better advice, but a few basic answers would be very helpful in terms of advice.

  139. Lyn87 says:

    OFF,

    No argument from me. She really was/is all that. But like I said… smallish church. I don’t recall any single men in her age cohort at all. Not even one. I think that if she put herself out there more the guys would find her. The only things that might work against her even then are 1) she is very pretty, and some guys are too shy to approach girls like that, and 2) she’s on the tall side… maybe 5’9 or 5″10, and some guys are put off by that, too. But there’s little doubt that she could do quite well if she went looking and initiated approaches. Then again… I don’t know that she was looking – I just know that she wasn’t with anyone when we were attending that church.

  140. Frugal Nerd says:

    Lyn87 & OFF,

    I have seen Christian women who were at least attractive and some quite beautiful choose not to pursue men for various reasons.

    1. Married to Jesus – who can be a better husband that Jesus? Certainly not any other man.
    2. Born and bread to hate men – I knew one 20s woman who would regularly wear t-shirts in public decrying how she didn’t need a boyfriend. I was quite shocked to find out she got married.
    3. Too holier than thou & Pharisaical.
    4. Down right weird personalities and not in a good way.
    5. Falls into any of the other traps of standards being to high (a 6’2″ woman expecting to find someone 5″ taller than her for example).

    This can and does happen in the Church and in some rare cases they drive the men to look completely outside the faith as the women within the faith and in the social circle of a given man are already taken or the opposite of wife material.

    As far as Andrea’s case (assuming she isn’t a troll), I suspect she falls into one of the reasons above, barring severe physical disability or abnormality or anything else she has chosen to omit.

    BTW, parts of the Midwest and Great Plains have a substantial Sudanese population (i.e. Grand Island, NE). If she is from a Sudanese family that immigrated as refugees from South Sudan or Darfur Provence she may well be terrified of advertising her availability. This combined with crooked teeth would account for many of her responses – and if so I also suspect her SMV/MMV may be higher than what she thinks.

  141. Andrea Renee says:

    Yes I’m disabled and black. I just starting working with an anti-trafficking ministry. I never new how easy it is to be traffic in a world a little than hell. My BA In speech communication. I want kids.
    @at thank you sincerely. I have nothing against the manoshore . I am not bored enough to troll on blogs

  142. infowarrior1 says:

    @Andrea Renee
    Let’s be realistic. There is only so much you can do. Likewise as is taught in the book of Job the book on suffering God doesn’t owe you anything.

    If God graces you ,praise God if not praise God. Whether with little or with many praise God(Philippians 4:12)

    Do what you can. But place your hopes in God.

  143. @Andrea Renee
    Please describe how you’re disabled. I guess what I’m after is your ability function on your own. Disabled is a word that’s difficult to parse because it’s used in many different ways. I’m assuming your disability is physical. Please explain. I have an idea for you.

  144. @Andrea Renee
    I know a guy that I think would be perfect for you. Leave a comment on my blog and I’ll get in touch with via email. He has a MMV of 7, but he’s emotionally disabled due to the abuse he received from his BPD former wife. She made him an incel for 7 years before she left him. When I say incel, I’m talking about a situation in which she gave him sex on his birthday. Yes, this is a guy that wants sex and babies.

  145. Andrea-Renee says:

    @Artisanal Toad
    I am not a troll. That being said, I began reading your blog. So far I enjoy your writing. I’m sorry for the situation with your family . I greatly look forward to hearing from you

  146. @Andrea Renee
    Relax. I don’t think you’re a troll. I’ll be sending you an email in another day or so. Patience, dear. You’ve waited 27 years, so what’s a few more days? Besides, you may not be pleased with what I suggest.

  147. desiderian says:

    “decrying how she didn’t need a boyfriend. I was quite shocked to find out she got married.”

    ASD.

    A man wants woman who loves only him to protect his patriarchy. Women subconsciously signal that capacity in various ways – the less socially adept, the less subtle.

    “standards being to high”

    Ridiculous standards exist to screen out men who can’t laugh at them.

  148. Andrea-Renee says:

    @ Artisanal Toad hope you well and that keep writing .
    In general while woman should marry young ,in the Word both issaic and Jacob married at or after fofty . So Godly men with teens daughters and Godly male friends in their age range may be a big help in this area. Who say your father- in – Law can’t be your bother in The Lord who is a year younger than you Or is that weird?

  149. Luke says:

    I suggest any woman aspiring to become a Christian wife to read Debi Pearl’s book “Created To Be HIs Helpmeet”. The chapter (#7 or 8) on the three types of men is alone worth the ten bucks or so for the book.

    The book is also a good way to screen out poor prospects for being wives. Give a copy to a young woman, and how angrily she reacts to its contents = how feminist (and thus unmarriageable) she is.

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