MarcusD pointed out a thread on CAF where a 34 year old divorcée and alpha widow is troubled that God hasn’t answered her prayers for a new husband she can fall head over heels in love with:
I never knew if I could “fall in love” with someone because I had never dated anyone prior to my ex husband, and I definitely wasn’t “in love” with him. After our divorce/annulment I did date one other guy (prior to my current boyfriend) who I was head over heels in love with. I would have moved to the moon with this guy. We had our issues, but I still would have been crazy excited to marry him. Granted, it didn’t work out, and he ended up completely breaking my heart… looking back I recognize that he is not who God wanted me to marry. HOWEVER, I find it interesting that I was given that relationship – despite the heartbreak, it gave me a glimpse of what it feels like to be crazy about someone, and it made me recognize that I am ABLE to experience that sort of feeling for a man.
SO. I would say if that relationship had never happened, I probably wouldn’t be as torn up about not being “in love” with my current boyfriend. But I have that as a comparison…and he also has a similar situation where he was head over heels crazy about his ex girlfriend, and so he has THAT as a comparison.
While her story is tightly packed with manosphere clichés, it is important to remember that she is a living, breathing, and hurting person. Our (collective) rejection of biblical marriage has created a sea of human misery, which is as easy to witness on Catholic Answers Forum and ChristianForums.com as it is on Yahoo Answers.
What most caught my attention in the thread however is her moment of clarity:
And yes, I know that I have trust issues with God on this matter – but I think my issues are founded in the fact that I have already failed at marriage once, am getting old – close to the point where I can’t have children, have made lots of mistakes in the past, and have seen my much more devout friends who are even older than I am still not find their spouse either, despite fervent prayer.
Even if you look on the Catholic dating sites – when you narrow the search to guys in your reasonable age range who actually follow the Church’s teachings, there are VERY few. Then find the ones of that group who you are actually attracted to? Hardly any.
So yeah…I feel sometimes like a girl in a war-stricken country where all the eligible men have literally been called away to war and there truly aren’t any left to marry. Dramatic? perhaps…but in the times we live in, our men face a secular battle against satan, and to find one who is devoted to his faith is becoming harder and harder.
Yet even when she can see the grim reality of the MMP for 30 something divorcées, she can only see the sin of men. In her mind, the reason it is so hard for a mid thirties woman to find a good husband and fall in love is something is wrong with men.
…in the times we live in, our men face a secular battle against satan