The restaurant analogy takes on a life of its own.

Last week I offered a rough analogy explaining why I don’t try to convince men who aren’t interested in marriage that they really should want it.  Anonymous Reader added on to this analogy with his own excellent comment.  This week fellow bloggers Private Man and Hawaiian Libertarian liked the combined analogy enough to create posts regarding it.  Private Man kicked it off with his post:  The Marriage Analogy – A Must Read.  Hawaiian Libertarian added further to the discussion with is post Perspective Makes a Difference, with his own analysis and a collection of follow on comments.  Check out both posts if you are interested.

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27 Responses to The restaurant analogy takes on a life of its own.

  1. Suz says:

    Yeah, that happens when you’re good.

  2. Alexander says:


  3. Good wisdom must be shared… and credit given appropriately.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Well I was going to read this. Was following the blog for a few months. Started clicking through the thread, reading the context.

    Saw some gruff concerning how some “Firepower” is no longer welcome to comment. Unsubscribing from the feed. Not as punishment, I just wasn’t aware this place worked like that.

    Continuing with the restaurant analogy, I don’t want to dine in a restaurant where people get ejected over the manager’s ego.

    It’s his restaurant and business seems booming, so there is no reason for him to be overly concerned. But if was my restaurant, I’d still want to know why. Even if I had no intention of changing the policy, and even if I truly did think it was in the benefit of the other patrons.

    [D: Firepower was acting like he owned the place. When I put him in moderation he threw a fit and left in a huff (I don’t miss him). He has explained his view of it on a post on his own blog (NSFW): Dalrock: Deceptive Hypocrite, Bore & Apostate]

  5. Lord Valtrex says:

    Modern marriage is like an old, familiar restaurant … under new management, with now horrible food and nightmarish service.

    Why continue to patronize this dreadful and harmful institution?

  6. gdgm+ says:

    Perhaps being pedantic… Isn’t it spelled “restaurant”?

    [D: Thank you. I had even run it through spell checker because it looked wrong. I’m not sure how I managed to screw it up.]

  7. deti says:

    Indeed. May Dalrock’s comment forever be known as the restauRANT.

  8. Crank says:

    Not to be overly picky, but I think AR’s post was really describing the restaurant down the street from Dalrock’s. I understood Dalrock’s restaurant to be the genuinely fine restaurant (good marriages), for which seating is very limited. Maybe I misunderstood.

    [D: Yes, this was my intent. AR’s comment did a good job of describing the larger problem though.]

  9. hisoj says:

    “It’s his restaurant and business seems booming, so there is no reason for him to be overly concerned. But if was my restaurant, I’d still want to know why.”

    if I caught a patron shitting in the salad buffet, I don’t think I’d care to know why they might be doing it. to continue the analogy. if you enjoy shitposting so much, maybe you should find another forum that caters to it? good luck, I don’t usually see many of those around.

  10. Bwana Simba says:

    Congrats Dalrock. You’ve created a helluva meme that is traveling throughout the Manosphere.

  11. Jimbo says:

    I’m a straight young male in my mid 20s. The only time I would consider marriage is in my 60s after I’ve spent 40 years fucking creme of the crop college aged females. And even in my 60s when I’m ready to marry, I’d only consider a wife who is between the age of 18-22.

    Actually, marriage wouldn’t interest me, as much as spreading my seed and having lots of bastards that I will not pay child support for because I’ve already developed an anonymity system that I can start using at anytime to make myself disappear out of a woman’s life at a moment’s notice.

    My wife has not been born yet and she will not be born for another 20 years or so.

  12. Legion says:

    Anonymous says:
    June 21, 2012 at 1:31 pm

    Firepower throws his shit all over the manosohere. If you like his gibberish, go to his blog. No one should have to put up with him.

  13. okrahead says:

    My formerly favorite restaurant is now out of business, as the owner stole too many credit card numbers and was imprisoned for identity theft. I suppose it was necessary, but I do still miss that succulent loin from time to time. Still, I snicker at how easily I have gotten off compared to so many others.

  14. greenlander says:

    Firepower throws his shit all over the manosohere. If you like his gibberish, go to his blog. No one should have to put up with him.

    Yeah, my same opinion. I don’t even read what he writes: when I see his name by a comment on a blog I just scroll down. A good friend of mine named Bill said this about Firepower: He’s “full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”

  15. BlackCat says:

    This type of analogy can be very powerful, and should be collected and edited into a single, short, easy-to-read post that can be linked to when you need to give someone something to chew on as an introduction to a problem they are not aware of or do not want to admit exists. For example:

  16. P Ray says:

    The only time I would consider marriage is in my 60s after I’ve spent 40 years fucking creme of the crop college aged females. And even in my 60s when I’m ready to marry, I’d only consider a wife who is between the age of 18-22.
    Quite reasonable, considering those “cream of the crop” women may not be telling you the truth about whether they are in an exclusive relationship with you.
    Always better to hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.

  17. P Ray says:

    ^ I find it funny, the idea of “parents must teach their kids right from wrong” … since parents are also supposed to teach students to respect authority … but pointing out to them that authority can be wrong, is “wrong”.
    Having seen those studying to become teachers, I’m sorry to say that in the time I was at university, I found a vast majority of them lacking in moral fibre (and sometimes intelligence).
    There are definitely good teachers out there, but as usual: the good stand out from the bad because there are so few of them.

  18. Anon says:

    While I agree that AR’s analogy is really good it also misses a bit. In an earlier comment someone commented that we get married in a church but divorced by a legal court. This would mean that the bouncers and management would not actually work for the restaurant but would be a separate organization enforcing their own set of rules about who gets brutalized and when. Not only do they rush in at the call of a damsel they also dictate the way the restaurant can be run. They say what can be served, when, to whom, who pays and how much. The owner, the chef, wait staff, and even patrons cannot say anything about it or they too will get beat up and dumped into the alley as well.

  19. Vindonnus says:

    And while we are at it with the restaurant and food analogies, it is worthwhile to revisit these classics, rescued by our host:

    Hat tip, Solomon II, wherever you are.

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  21. ballista74 says:

    To add another perspective (a never married man) to the restaurant as it exists now:

    There’s a number of men who’ve never been inside the restaurant. He looks, wondering what it is all about. Maybe he looks from the grills, maybe he looks from farther away, it depends on the time and place in his live. But he can see what’s going on, see all the men getting beat up, robbed and thrown out. It’s not really that important since a woman at the grills really hasn’t been interested in him long enough for her to want him to take her inside the restaurant. But it does seem like at least a few couples have been in the restaurant a good while and have been enjoying themselves. If that is the case, it seems that the restaurant must be doing something right, right enough to make it worth going in despite the chance of being beaten up and robbed and thrown out. In that way, he doesn’t have to consider it too personally yet and anything about marriage is both taken authoritatively and intellectually. At least he has his friends, and his job.

    But one of his friends gets interested enough in a woman to take her inside the restaurant. “Okay, if it’s good news for my friend, I’ll rejoice and be happy for him.”, he thinks. A week or two later after the honeymoon he telephones his newly married friend who’s sitting inside the restaurant talking with his new wife. The new husband (NH from here on out) picks up his cell phone. He greets the newly married friend and asks how the restaurant is going.

    “Very well”, NH says.

    Just as he gets done saying that, the waiter walks up, ready to take their order. NH is overheard on the line, looking at the wife and not the waiter: “Can I have the ribeye steak, please?” The wife makes a noise the never married man (NMM) can hear, but he can look through the window and see a look on her face that says she’s not pleased. Then in a defeated tone he hears “Okay, the Chicken Parmesan then.”.

    NNM looks at the restaurant window in amazement. “He’s having to ask for permission from the wife to eat something? And she’s dictating what he does eat? Maybe I shouldn’t ask, but I’ll try anyway.”

    “I thought maybe you could step outside a few minutes while you’re waiting on the food and we could have a beer by the grills and catch up on things…”, NMM man says. Again NH looks at his wife and asks if he could step outside a few minutes while they’re waiting on the food. The wife shoots him an even more displeasing look than the one before.

    “Sorry, I can’t come.”, NH says.

    Now NMM is in complete disbelief. He thinks about hearing the stories of the ones that were beaten up and kicked out about what it was like in the restaurant while they were left alone to dine. He didn’t quite believe them when they spoke all the time about working hard from sunrise to sundown in some way or another to keep their wives happy because “if momma isn’t happy, no one is happy”, and all the other stories and jokes that they would tell about being thankful their genitals are attached and so on when it came to being inside the restaurant. Then, NMM thought: “If it’s really like that for my friend, maybe some of those other stories are more accurate than I know and being inside that restaurant isn’t so great after all?”

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