The one that got away.

My wife has been suggesting that I write a post on Katy Perry’s song/video:

In the video we see an elderly Katy Perry who still mopes around pining for a high school boyfriend despite having grown old with a loyal husband.  My wife was disgusted by the message of this video having known women in real life who thought and acted in this way.  This should serve as a warning to men considering marriage;  check very carefully for this sort of vibe.  Women often feel entitled to nurse this sort of “poor me” feeling, regardless of how good a husband you are. This is also why you need to take your potential wife’s past sexual history very seriously.

My wife wondered if this song/video wasn’t at least in part an explanation for why Katy Perry’s husband Russell Brand filed for divorce. She thought the timing was suspicious, since he filed in December and the video was released in November.

Rollo Tomassi beat me to the punch on this with his excellent post Five Minutes of Alpha.  He astutely points out that Roissy nailed this back in 2010 with his original post by the same title (Five Minutes of Alpha).  Back then Roissy pointed out that Katy appeared to not have gotten over the alpha who snubbed her in high school.  It was Katy’s own on stage attempt to show that she really had gotten over him which tipped Roissy off.  Here is a quote Roissy shared from this story:

As the crowd laughed and cheered, she adopted a bit of swagger and added, “Oh yeah, you really chose right, honey. What’s up now, playa?” Becoming an international, Grammy-nominated pop star evidently does wonderful things for your self-confidence.

As Janet Reno would say, Money and fame takes away alpha!  Roissy quoted the following a bit further down:

At the end of the tune, she looked directly at Lopes, held up her hand — which prominently displays her engagement ring — and said, “That’s cool, I got mine,” and mockingly blew him a kiss. The singer is set to marry raunchy British comic Russell Brand…

Now just a few years later comes this video for a previously released song about a high school heartbreak.  Note the reference to money and rings, in direct contradiction to her original quote:

All this money can’t buy me a time machine (Nooooo)
It can’t replace you with a million rings (Nooooo)
I shoulda told you what you meant to me (Woooooow)
‘Cause now I paid the price

In another life
I would be your girl
We’d keep all our promises
Be us against the world

It is worth noting that while the video was only released in November of 2011, the song itself was released as part of an album back in August of 2010, which was two months before she married Russell Brand and a month before she gave the concert where she confronted the alpha she ostensibly had gotten over.

What up now playa?

This entry was posted in Aging Feminists, Choice Addiction, Divorce, Finding a Spouse. Bookmark the permalink.

97 Responses to The one that got away.

  1. doesn't matter says:

    Unrelated, but I read this and thought of you (it’s highly analytical and numbers-driven): http://evoandproud.blogspot.com/2009/08/where-are-women.html

    Excerpt:

    *Single Males per 100 Single Females, by Age Bracket*

    15-19 years old —– 114.3
    20-24 years old —– 168.1
    25-29 years old —– 177.6
    30-34 years old —– 133.2
    35-39 years old —– 103.2
    40-49 years old —— 55.7
    50-59 years old —— 39.5
    60-74 years old —— 32.4

  2. anon66 says:

    This is why I dislike the movie Titanic. At the end of the movie Winslet’s character ends up back on the ship with DiCaprio to which I ask “What about her husband?” Was a very short fling on the doomed ship more important to her than a lifetime of marriage and children. Compare that to the end of Saving Private Ryan where the old soldier wants to be judged on his accomplishments, including marraige and children, so that the sacrifice of the others would not be in vain. A moving ending for me where Titanic is just empty emotionalism.

    Men tend to understand my point. Women think I am being silly.

  3. I think what needs to be emphasized here is the lack of accountability in the video’s story. If the artist guy were to have simply NEXTed young Katy and didn’t die (by “accident”) the impact is unavoidably about her. In other words, she has to own the mistake and assume at least partial responsibility in driving him away.

    This would be the more realistic scenario, and in fact the song’s lyrics actually align with the reality that the video attempts to sugarcoat. However, as is the theme of feminine solipsism, women need to fabricate a pathology to preserve their egos when reality is uncomfortably incongruent with their self-awareness.

    Naturally we’re expected to believe the guy was reconsidering Katy’s behavior as he sentimentally fondles the veil that drops from the Mustang’s visor just long enough to distract him from the rock slide and send him careening over dead man’s curve like Matt Dillon in Rumblefish. It wasn’t her fault, just an unfortunate misunderstanding with a tragic end.

    There is no true accountability for the female imperative, only an endlessly fluid re-scripting of ego incongruencies.

  4. YaBoymatt says:

    It’s assumed the song is about her crack addicted tattoo’d ex who is now in the band gym class heroes, same with her other song “circling the drain”.

    [D: Interesting. She does look a lot like the last girlfriend in this video.]

  5. Dalrock says:

    Great point Rollo Tomassi. Even before you pointed out that Roissy had already nailed this (which I had totally forgotten) I was thinking that about the ending of the video. She couldn’t handle the fact that she had screwed up (in one way or another), and I would also argue couldn’t handle the thought of him being happy without her. So she killed him off with him wishing he had her back on the way down.

  6. Escoffier says:

    D, this is the same point you made re: Lorraine what’s-her-name. Screwed once on the basketball court at age 19 by some guy who went on to publish Nirvana and never got over it, even left her husband because of it.

    [D: Good point. Link]

  7. grerp says:

    Why is there always a man sacrifice at the end of these chickies’ vids? Gaga does this a lot; the difference is no one seems sad when the guy is set alight/pushed from a balcony/shot in the face.

    The whole idea that that future proceeds from that past is farcical, both for the girl grotesque and, very unfortunately, the State of California. Neither will look anything like that in 50 years.

    Homemade tattoos. ::shudder::

  8. Escoffier says:

    The state of California looks so different than it did even 20 years ago. What it will look in 50 years would take an essay but in a word: UGLY.

  9. “This is why I dislike the movie Titanic. At the end of the movie Winslet’s character ends up back on the ship with DiCaprio to which I ask ‘What about her husband?’ Was a very short fling on the doomed ship more important to her than a lifetime of marriage and children.”

    Sigh. I unfortunately saw this movie multiple times as a barely pubescent girl, so I feel compelled to add details that will shed more light on the female psyche. Winslet’s character doesn’t have a husband during the main events of the movie, though she does have a fiance whom she treats rather badly. If memory serves me correctly, she sleeps with another man (whom she just met) without bothering to break off her engagement first. She also tries to keep the expensive engagement gift he gave her, or at any rate refers to it as hers decades (centuries?) later.

    What’s interesting is that the fiance is an alpha–socially powerful, violent, largely indifferent to her–while her paramour is more of a beta–a sexually timid white knight who dies saving her life. After he dies she marries another man, who also appears to be a beta, but he can’t ever inspire the passion that the first beta did. So the movie isn’t so much about getting “five minutes of alpha” as it is an instruction manual on how betas can succeed with beautiful women. (Basically, target young women who have never been in love before; be different than the men in her usual surroundings; and be an artist. It’s a bit of a tall order.)

    Sorry for the digression. Carry on.

  10. Eric says:

    Dalrock:

    Once again, Roissy is engaging in a lot of projection. That’s typical of most of what he writes: he projects his own attitudes onto a completely different social construct and tries to weave a whole interpretation out of it.

    I doubt if Katy Perry has ‘issues’ because she was snubbed by a so-called ‘alpha’. She’s part of cultural milieu where women are educated and conditioned to hate men and treat us all as inferiors. It isn’t that one in man in particular that bothers her: she’s bothered because her ‘girl power’, narcissism and sense of entitlement met with resistance. That just reinforces her already- conditioned hatred of men.

    In her song, she simply does what all narcissits do in these situations: she plays the ‘victim card’ and tells how, if she really had the power of the goddess she thinks she is, she’d force this guy into a relationship. Not because she cares a whit about him personally; but because he is a man; and she HAS to feel superior to him by making him her love-slave against his own wishes.

    This is really the attitude of the majority of women, in a nutshell.

  11. ybm says:

    Katy Perry really just another piece of evidence of the triumph of gender raunch feminism, the final victory of the bad girl over the good girl. That every good girl must be “bad” on the inside or they won’t get that alpha they were eyeing from across the house party kitchen or that sexy thug they saw in the mall food court. Think Brittany Spears and Lindsay Lohan fell apart? We aint seen nothing yet.

  12. deti says:

    Eric:
    Agree with you on this:
    “She’s part of cultural milieu where women are educated and conditioned to hate men and treat us all as inferiors.”

    Disagree with this:
    “It isn’t that one man in particular that bothers her: she’s bothered because her ‘girl power’, narcissism and sense of entitlement met with resistance.”

    It IS this one man in particular that bothers her. She remembers acutely how this one man d**ked her over in high school and hurt her feelings. (If it weren’t this one guy, why is she specifically calling him out by name in public, other than to humiliate him the way she thinks he humiliated her?) She wasn’t all full of grrl power or narcissism in HS; she was probably some lovestruck teenager who fell hard for the beautiful alpha. She loved him; he didn’t love her; and her feeewings were hurt. She’s never gotten over it; not because her power was threatened, but because HE hurt HER and didn’t give her the relationship/validation/affirmation she wanted.

    To me, it’s simply that she loved him and never got over it. That video is a paean tribute to her HS love.

  13. anonymous says:

    the only reason to fear a woman’s sexual past is because in the event of divorce, there is automatic mother custody and imputed income child support. Change the system to automatic father custody, and a wimminz five minutes of alpha can safely be ignored. Any additional talk of “game” is just naval gazing.

  14. Opus says:

    Now it is my turn for a confession Dalrock: I had never previously heard of Katy Perry (though I know of a rather tiresome and effeminate comic by the name of Russell Brand).

    I listened to the song fearing that as with just about every modern song I listen to it would be derivative (it is) – but I won’t get sidetracked by my view that there are simply no decent female song-writers or the reasons for that – but merely point out that this is a version of ‘Leader of the Pack’ (I want my bad-boy back). I also noticed the female violence against the painting – a well known female tactic; I once had cause to represent a female client for doing that to her boyfriend’s papers, and Ole Bull’s (19th c Norwegian composer) wife threw some of his manuscripts on the fire in anger one day.

  15. ybm says:

    Yes destruction of men’s property is one of the tropes used by women to “stoke the flames of emotion” in their demented minds which can end in a domestic quite quickly. I too have been subject to this, as the woman I had been living with for a few years destroyed my entire collection of collectors beer glasses in a fit of rage because I did not comment on her haircut.

    I moved out (month to month rental) that weekend and haven’t seen or spoken to her since.

  16. ray says:

    a third-rate “artist” with little original lyric and musical content, and mucho “celebrity” packaged status, carefully marketed to her target audience

    back in the sixties, before the advent of female clonette “artists” like alanis morrisette et al, katy would never have cracked the top 40 with her maudlin re-hashing of fem psychodramas

    now, of course, she’s a huge star along with the seeminly endless stream of similarly mini-talented divas and cool-chick singers (often trading on their underage sexuality)… all with the same intonations, the same musical phrasings, same lyric content etc

    this now passes for “art”

    the only thing less relevant than katy perry’s artistic “contributions” is what Rossy had to say about it

  17. deti says:

    “If it weren’t this one guy, why is she specifically calling him out by name in public, other than to humiliate him the way she thinks he humiliated her?”

    Specifically, if it weren’t this one obscure, nonfamous high school guy, why is Katy Perry (a very high status, internationally famous, critically acclaimed, fantastically wealthy, very physically attractive young woman who could have literally any man she wants) calling out by name in public and at one of her concerts one Shane Lopes (an obscure high school footballer from an equally obscure location and whose greatest claims to fame are his high school football career and that he once dated Katy Perry), other than to humiliate him the way she thinks he humiliated her years ago in high school?

  18. quarterlife_dc says:

    “This is also why you need to take your potential wife’s past sexual history very seriously.” I know of two women who had never slept with any other man besides the man they married and both confessed during marriage to wanting a fling with their “one that got away.” In both cases, the “one that got away” was a popular male high school platonic friend she pined after for all of high school. Very disturbingly, both girls went out of their way to see their “one that got away” while married or engaged by going to reunions alone just for him, meeting him for coffee, dropping by his workplace, etc. In other words, a woman doesn’t need to actually have her 5 minutes in the sack with the Alpha to have “one that got away syndrome.” She just needs to buy into the “poor me” myth that is perpetuated by chick lit novels/romantic comedies.

  19. ybm says:

    Because the alpha who got away is Travie McCoy not Shane Lopes.

  20. deti says:

    Sorry. According to the primary source article, Mr. Lopes did not date Katy Perry. She had a crush on him that he did not know about.

    So the clause should read “whose greatest claims to fame are his high school football career and that Katy Perry once had a high school crush on him”)

  21. Lily says:

    I am pondering whether Russell Brand is an alpha. He would be under Roissys definition. He doesn’t really fit with that. I’d also say he has a lot of feminine energy, like a lot of a certain type of man who has a ‘lot of success with women’ does.

    As for Katy Perry and her one that got away. TBH I didn’t know who she was till she married Russell Brand (and still don’t really), I was just scanning the latest comments over at Hussy Shaming and note the comment to the ‘do over’, people want to a different outcome to what happened like when they lose a game. I suspect if this guy from her past professed his undying love that would be enough for her (assuming this stuff is true). That’s what she wants. Not to actually be with him.

  22. Lily says:

    @TFH
    How old are middle to upper class Indian young women (and young men) these days when they get married? And are they expected to be virgins when they get married?

  23. Uncle Ed says:

    TFH are we going to have an up coming generation of spinsters and cat ladies and MGTOWs?

  24. Lily says:

    @quarterlife_dc
    hmm, your story reminds me of the beta boy pining after the homecoming queen (or whatever she’s called in america)/cheerleader type even when there are ‘geeky girls’ who adore him who he doesn’t see. Admittedly perhaps I have watched too much Buffy the Vampire Slayer and more mainstream American high school stuff, but I’ve seen similar stuff online from real men.

  25. Jim says:

    Good God. That Katy Perry video is absolutely cringeworthy, even more so against the context of her relationships. At the risk of channeling Rob Gordon from ‘High Fidelity’, I don’t know what’s more disturbing, that talentless bimbos with serious maturity issues like Madonna, Alannis Morrisette, Brittany Spears, Christina Aquilera, Gwen Stefani, and now Katy Perry are hugely successful or that millions of women comprise their fan bases and idolize them.

  26. Lily says:

    why is Katy Perry (a very high status, internationally famous, critically acclaimed, fantastically wealthy, very physically attractive young woman who could have literally any man she wants)
    This description is amazing (at least to me). So I googled her name plus net worth & it’s $50mn and then I googled Jordan aka Katie Price and her net worth is $65 million. (caveat off the top googling, not proper research). Given the current poor exchange rate and how tiny the UK is in comparison to the USA, Jordan ‘wins’. And she wouldn’t bleat on about some man she hankered after years ago (she is no ‘softie’) so perhaps she really ‘doesn’t need a man’. (in case any social intelligence challenged people read this comment, I’m certainly not saying ‘go girl to Jordan, God forbid lol).

  27. imnobody says:

    @vitabenedicta

    Leo Dicaprio in Titanic was a poor men but not a beta. And Kate Winslet’s fiance was rich but not an alpha. I think you have it wrong. Leo is the exciting bad boy and the fiance is the boring wealthy man.

  28. Lily says:

    I hated that movie Titanic. She acted really badly. I know they tried to make the fiance look bad but she did get married afterwards.

    And if she had been a touch on the lighter side, the poor boy (played by Leonardo) would not have had to die like that.

  29. Sweet As says:

    Marginally related, but I wanted to share with you a tv program (made in the UK) that we are viewing here in NZ: My Big Fat Gypsy Weddings. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Fat_Gypsy_Weddings)

    It focuses on the traveller community and it’s strict gender roles, marriage, etc. It’s *fascinating* to watch and learn about this culture, and it is very “traditional” in a lot of ways, and “strange” in others (in a sort of “wondrous strange” way).

    Anyway, thought it might pique your interest.

  30. Lily says:

    Just watched the video. Is Katy Perry’s main target audience teenage girls? In which case, this is *very* good product and marketing. It’s that drama-filled relationship/think James Dean, Buffy and Angel (even if not originally aimed at teenagers) etc etc. I’m guessing only about 30-50% have it before the age of 20.

    That aside, there is a teeny bit of a good message in it, I’d like to show it to my niece she is a touch of a drama queen with her boyfriend. As I probably was with mine at that age. Not that he was particularly mature. I don’t remember that much about it now, it was a long time ago though there was a bit of angst. No deaths or tattoos.

    @TFH
    Thanks for the info.

    @SweetAs
    Yes, some have quipped that it’s very similar to what some in the ‘manosphere’ think is ideal. Reality doesn’t quite match though. Well at least not with that programme.

  31. Lily says:

    @TFH
    Assuming you haven’t seen the programme. If you had, you would not want to associate India with it. In fact, many say having the word Gypsy in it is insulting to ‘real Gypsies’ i.e. Romany types. They are more like ‘tinkers’ (or even lesspolitely ‘pikeys’) more linked to Irish traveller folk. But they like pretending they are ‘proper Gypsies’. The Irish don’t want them though there are some in Ireland. Apparently the word ‘chav’ is derived from a Romany word.

  32. Lily says:

    despite having grown old with a loyal husband
    I don’t understand the first bit of the video. The significance (if there is one) of the moody ‘how was it’ or the putting the shoes away. Where was she? It’s not the outfit she was wearing when she visits the canyon. He’s also wearing his wedding ring on the wrong hand.

  33. Rmaxd says:

    The first gypsies were indian & were employed by the Maharaja, the owner of the taj mahal, & his predecessor

    They were essentially musical mozarts of their time, they created everything from the salsa to the fox trot, or at least their origins, most latin music is indian

    Alot of latin ballroom dance was created by indian gypsies

    As the owner of the taj mahal, fell out of power, the thousands of troupes of musicians in the Taj mahal became a wandering nomadic group of musicians, taking their music & dance to places like spain & latin america, creating the latin music & culture we know today …

  34. Uncle Ed says:

    TFH

    Even if older women can have kids biologically, men will still prefer the young stuff and do things the normal way as opposed to jerking off in a petri dish.

  35. Uncle Ed says:

    @TFH

    Men shouldn’t go for older wives ,or same age wives if they want kids. They should become financially stable and then go for the young stuff (which is what they really want).If they cannot find one then they shouldn’t have kids. I can’t see IVF becoming the new norm.

  36. Uncle Ed says:

    Personally Im 31 and women 25 and up are much too old for me.The wall comes long before 40.

  37. Lily says:

    @TFH I meant the programme SweetAs referred to, not India.

  38. Rmaxd says:

    @TFH
    “VR Sex by 2020 will disrupt the sexual market that chops female power by about 30%. Many men will not be able to get a woody for any woman who is a 7 or lower, as their brains will be fried and warped from the VR sex. 8s will be treated like 5s. ”

    This has already happened, porns basically desensitized men to normal women, there used to be a time, when i would literally be attracted to most women, thanks to porn, thank gawd i am no longer attracted to ugly chicks …

    This also why most men prefer video games to women, theyre desensitised to real women

    Seriously I dont even see ordinary looking chicks anymore, theyre a none entity … lol

    “Stem cells to create young eggs will happen (pretty soon, in fact). This will enable older women to have children. Overall, I think this benefits both men and women in a reproductive sense. ”

    I highly doubt this will happen, you cant just use stem cells to slow down a womans eggs, aging process

    It’s a natural process of senescence, & a whole body function, the eggs might be young, but the womans old age prevents the eggs from fertilising correctly

    Its too complicated to allow old women to give birth, not to mention the massive defects & still births

    It’s easier to create an artificial womb, then it is to develop a technology for old over the hill women … it’s basically physically impossible

  39. Rmaxd says:

    “If they cannot find one then they shouldn’t have kids. I can’t see IVF becoming the new norm.”

    IVF isnt recommended for old women, once you hit 35, IVF’s efficacy drops & the birth defects & still birth rates go through the roof

    IVF is designed for young women, who’re infertile, not older women, once a woman hits 40, IVF has a ZERO percent success rate

  40. Rmaxd says:

    @TFH “Even today, young donor eggs implanted into a 43-year old woman, works fine. It is the EGGS that age quickly. The womb is viable until a later age.”

    This is a common misconception about IVF, if you check the statistics on IVF treatment, IVF has a success rate of 20 -30% at 35, & about zero success rate around 40

    Theres another type of IVF treatment, with slightly higher rates, of about 8% at 40, but these women are in the minority, & the large number of birth defects & still births exceeds the 8% by about 60-75%

  41. Rmaxd says:

    I was referring to ART, as the second form of fertility treatment, while ART is superior it’s still around the 40% range at around 40, & drops steeply similar to regular IVF after 40

    I’ll have to dig up my notes, also you still have large problems with birth defects etc., as the woman gets older, from what I remember not even ART is recommended after 45

  42. Rmaxd says:

    Hi TFH,

    Yes, ART uses donor eggs … i’m not arguing about aging eggs

    Here we go, the success rate of donor eggs, is around 35-50% on average

    CDC stats

    Age 35, Own eggs 38.8%, Donor eggs 58.3%
    Age 36, Own eggs 36.6%, Donor eggs 54.0%
    Age 37, Own eggs 34.1%, Donor eggs 51.7%
    Age 38, Own eggs 29.1%, Donor eggs 54.5%
    Age 39, Own eggs 27.4%, Donor eggs 47.9%
    Age 40, Own eggs 20.7%, Donor eggs 50.7%
    Age 41, Own eggs 17.0%, Donor eggs 51.2%
    Age 42, Own eggs 12.4%, Donor eggs 49.5%
    Age 43, Own eggs 7.6%, Donor eggs 54.9%
    Age 44, Own eggs 4.2%, Donor eggs 50.9%
    Age 45, Own eggs 3.0%, Donor eggs 48.7%
    Age 46, Own eggs 4.6%, Donor eggs 45.7%
    Age 47, Own eggs 4.2%, Donor eggs 44.6%

  43. Sweet As says:

    thank you, yes, i know the origins of the term “gypsy” and as well as the history of the various groups and cultures as well.

    i was, simply, talking in specific about this show and how I found it interesting, and how the gender roles function. today, i watched an episode where a 17 yr old girl married. I was struck by how “slutty” these girls dress (prior to marriage), and yet do not behave in any way that might be seen as “bad” (no drinking, no sex or kissing before marriage — everything very closely guarded). Then, once married, they dress much more conservatively, and look forward to having children and taking them through the cultural milestones. Just very interesting to me, and a totally different perspective than our modern culture.

  44. YBM says:

    Hahaha, so for all their prognostications, older women who get pregnant have literally decided to cuckold themselves with thugette spawn! And I thought those wife-swinger guys were weird!

  45. Rmaxd says:

    @Sweet AS

    Indian culture is interesting, but the women have a warped sense of alpha male

    Young indian women, are very tribal in their tastes, they seem to love the wild unkempt, just walked out of a mud hut village look

    Not only do they dress more conservatively after marrying, they also loose their looks & let themselves go … lol

    Not to mention their attitudes go south, indian women are pain in the asses … lol

    Yea, they put up a shy demure, traditional front, but try holding a conversation with them & sprint not run for the hills …

    I’ve had plenty of relatives tryng to hook me up with indian chicks, & their own daughters, even the chicks in india have this vague, anti-male vibe about them … no thnx ..

    The best chicks I’ve found so far, who respect men are probably eastern european, much nicer then even japanese or oriental chicks

  46. Rmaxd says:

    @TFH

    In your original post, I thought you were referring to women having their own kids

    I really dont see the point in donor eggs, if you’re going to have someone else’s kid, you might as well let someone else have it, & adopt …

    Women are nuts … lol

  47. Rmaxd says:

    They can already do that … not sure about eggs yet though …

  48. YBM says:

    Dalrock:
    I know you didn’t mean to post what you did but….

    “[D: Interesting. She does look a lot like the last girlfriend in this video.]”

    That is Katy Perry.

  49. Rmaxd says:

    Yea women use kids as their shiny new pussypass & woe is me, i’m a bigger victim then you, status whoring

    I find it hilarious, getting up late at night & changing diapers becomes their new drama, or soap …

  50. Rmaxd says:

    ““[D: Interesting. She does look a lot like the last girlfriend in this video.]”

    That is Katy Perry.”

    She banged him … for old times sake … no doubt … one more try at the 5 minutes of alpha that got away

    Russel Brand, might be a player, but being a player is all about screening, if you dont screen for women correctly, you will get eventually get screwed irrespective of alpha tingles …

  51. YBM says:

    @Rmaxd

    Well, take this with a nice helping of salt, but this is a single off his album that came out in November:

    “That I can have any girl but I stayed with you
    I guess everybody plays the foo-ooh-ool and
    Now you think your coming back to me
    But that’s something that I just don’t see”

    In the third verse he makes reference to the girl he’s singing about getting dropped from her record label (which Perry was 4 times during her career) and to leave the ring on the table (he gave her a promise ring in 2009 just before they broke up).

  52. Rmaxd says:

    lol … Katy Perry gets pumped & dumped … again … what a surprise …

    In the vid below, it shows she cheated on him, he caught her with another man in his bed …

    Once a slut, always a slut, compulsive slut disorder 101 …

    What’s even more hilarious, if you check the dancing of the black chick, she gets all serious at the slutty parts of the choreography …

    Sluts are actually proud of being able to hook up with hundreds of guys, & proud of their slutty behaviour, as if it were something defining their womanhood

    Ask a woman about the slutty crap she’s done, & watch the pride & surety in every word …

  53. Anonymous says:

    There’s been a lot of research about the “First Love” phenomenon. Women seem to imprint on the first man they feel genuinely in love with – which typically happens in their teenage years or in college, depending on the woman’s standards. Here’s an excerpt from an article summing said research:

    “””First relationships can be intense, passionate and inspire a great deal of bad poetry. But, according to new research, if you want to find happiness in later life, it is best to avoid puppy love altogether.

    The claim comes in a book called Changing Relationships, a collection of new research papers by Britain’s leading sociologists, edited by Dr Malcolm Brynin, principal research officer at the Institute for Social and Economic Research at the University of Essex.

    Brynin found that the euphoria of first love can damage future relationships. “Remarkably, it seems that the secret to long-term happiness in a relationship is to skip a first relationship,” said Brynin. “In an ideal world, you would wake up already in your second relationship.”””

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/jan/18/relationships-love

    (Keep in mind that a woman imprints on the first man she actually loves, not necessarily her first ‘serious’ relationship – as we know, women will go into supposed serious relationships with men they don’t feel a thing towards, purely for social status).

    Of course, the researchers completely misinterpret the implications for society, but still. Given this research, I don’t see how one could in good faith recommend a man marry any woman past the age of 20 – and even 20 is pushing it! And given women’s propensity to all fall in love with the same type of man, its further evidence that feminism, and “female choice”, are incompatible with a monogamous society.

  54. caballarius1 says:

    “Given this research, I don’t see how one could in good faith recommend a man marry any woman past the age of 20 – and even 20 is pushing it!”

    Which is why the ancients married girls off at 13. Even my mother-in-law was married at 14. As usual, the old ways are the best ways.

  55. krakonos says:

    @doesn’t matter
    I noticed similar phenomenon. In (our local) media there are many stories of 30 something women (not attractive) having many good prospects in recent let’s say 5-10 years. I saw similar things with my own eyes. That’s in direct contradiction with old and manosphere/PUA wisdom. I thought it might be either some kind of propaganda or or result of advance of polygyny (old men young women remarriages, signle motherhood, cock carouslels -> cougars). When you add very low birth rates in the West in recent decades you have much more older men then their younger cohort (with 1.4 TFR, in next generation you have about 70% of men compared to previous generation). Those men, when remarry, do not have any more children (woman remains childless) or only one more. It means another decrease in fertility.

    In the least vilonet scenario you have hordes of men (usually from higher income and education level) who have no incentive to invest in society thus lowering their work effort. It will have disastrous effects on pension system and health care due to aging population and more expensive care. Leaving the Western World in suicidal spiral. And this is the “best case” scenario.
    Those numbers of single men unable to find mates are even higher/significantly higher than islamic states (depends of concrete state).

    What really shocks me is incompetence (or impotence?) of muslims. Now they have hordes of young men with no prospects and hordes of men grinded by the divorce industry (with no chance to see their kids). It means at least 30%+ of all young and midlle aged men. They can present Islam as a solution for those men – import some muslim women (for example in Iraq there is shortage of men due to recent conflict and low polygyny*) and present Islam as a solution for marriage** and divorce courts**. Even if Western countries accept drastic measures to suppress this message the men will get it and within one generation they will outnumber young men (magic of low fertility rate). This would result into Dar al-Islam within two generations. Simple an effective.

    * As in other muslim countries except Sub-Saharan Africa (and to much lower instance Saudi Arabia).
    ** Western world offers no chances for those men and thus even Islam offers them a chance.

  56. Rmax,

    True about Eastern Europeans.

    Im there weeks of the year, as well as I am in India for several weeks in a year. Feminism is a huge thing among Indians. Its difficult to guage the masses in the slums, the media doesnt dig that deep, but pop culture in India is like an exaggerated cartoonish version of the US, where they grab any cause, green energy, feminism, whatever with a vigor that is scary.

    No easier women in the world to deal with than in eastern Europe. From Tallin to Sophia and all in between, definately where Id send a friend who seeks good marriage odds

  57. greyghost says:

    It’s easier to create an artificial womb, then it is to develop a technology for old over the hill women …
    this will be the next step for old women. Combine this with the student loans issue with all of the liberal arts degrees for girls and we will have a saturated market of young women selling eggs for artificial wombs for single men to buy and use. That would be something huh

  58. grey

    Good point, what a mess.

    These liberal arts degrees are causing havoc already, the educated ignorant running around claiming their rightful spoils.

    Also, the liberal arts encroachment into the other tangible brick and mortar degrees.

  59. PA says:

    One striking thing about this video is how unsexy the artist guy is. Both of them really. This is because of pop culture’s scrubbing away of aggressive male sexuality. Woman-on-top is the only sexual position allowed on screen. When was the last time you saw a man in a movie fucking a woman like Mickey Roarke did Kim Bassinger?

    Going back to the Perry character – artist guy dynamic, it was an eros-dampening gender reversal: he gets thrown on the bed, she paints a moustache on her face. When he fatefully storms out of the room, he does it like an effette fag. Won’t even shoulder-check her as she stands in his way.

  60. Höllenhund says:

    “Some debate whether ‘Romania’ as a country was named after them, since a lot of them were concentrated there for a while.”

    Romania was named after the Roman Empire.

  61. Höllenhund says:

    I’ve posted this lately but I post it again:

    I’m glad someone mentioned Kevin Federline and Russell Brand. They seem to be the exact type of man that thrives in a feminized society. Such men are enabled by a particular type of woman: career-oriented, ambitious, high-earning and at the same time utterly ignorant of either male or female sexuality plus psychologically feral and primitive. See: Katy Perry and Britney Spears. They’re always screwed over by their own hypergamy.

  62. Rmaxd says:

    @empath

    Indian women are personifications of the word bitches, basically if you’ve got game & see through their crap, theyll hate you for it

    Indian women live for beta’s, theyre born & bred to sacrifice themselves for beta’s, as they hate being challenged or called out on their shit … more entertainment for me ..

    Men are essentially social forms of dowry, for women to use to raise their status, a pissed off indian women, is her husband scraping a living

    @Empath Indian women are essentially lazy … lol they dont give a crap about the environment, all they care about is looking like pure chaste brides …

    Which is why the feminist culture down there, its just a bit more primitive, in india women are SCARED to go out on their own in cased they get raped … all indian men are seen as primitive rapists, cos all indian women see themselves as pure virginal brides … even after popping out 10 kids …

    It gets worse if theyre religous …

    Over here we have sleeping beauty, over in india they have sleeping raped by a fat guy beauty

    You see tragic rape soaps as a staple drama plotline, where the indian princess & her family whine at a burly alpha to regain their daughters honor, who after getting the rapist jailed, falls in love with the rape victim & they live happily ever after ….

    In fact in every single movie ever made … lecherous fat guy trying it on with the puritan indian princess … rape hysteria is a staple of all indian movies

    If you thought american women were gold diggers, wait till you check out indians, they hate paying for anything … on a date, go dutch & she’ll literally walk out of the restaurant furious … lol

    Eastern european in contrast, always side with the man, they always try & see the best side of you, & are sexily demure & submissive, not to mention smoking hot …

    If I was ever to settle down, it would be with two eastern european women, fuck monogamy

    That is if i had the patience to put up with women, which i no longer have

  63. Rmaxd says:

    @Greyghost

    I have doubts about the birth defects & miscarriages, of donor eggs, & stem cell grown eggs in older women

    There is no way, the womb of an older woman can gestate an embryo correctly, without causing massive dna damage & birth defects

    A womb might age slower, but bringing a child to term, requires a healthy immune system & healthy bodily functions, in order for the child to grow correctly, something a 35 year old does not have, compared to the 25 year old …

    Child birth involves the whole body & biology of a woman, not just the womb …

  64. OT (sorry, but you need like… a tip-line or something for these things), but Dalrock, I thought you’d want to check out a cracked.com article:

    http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-5-reasons-marriage-scares-men-arent-what-you-think/

  65. ybm says:

    @natewinchester

    From the cracked article:

    “So over time, we’ve come to learn that the pattern of all relationships is “meet, date, commit, break up.” Even if it’s not a conscious thought, right at the forefront of our brains, it’s still there. Because of this, the mere idea of marriage is foreign to us. We’re not thinking about the fact that marriage means “committing to stay together forever.” We’re thinking, “Won’t that make our eventual breakup a hundred times harder?”

    Hahah cracked magazine now gives better relationship information than any other publication. Look at the truth in this paragraph.

  66. Rmaxd says:

    “Men, on the other hand, feel like failures if they can’t financially provide that type of a ceremony. But that’s understating what a double edged sword it is for us because on one hand, if you can’t afford to give her a wedding that makes her feel like royalty, you’re inadequate. But if you do pull it off, you’re now left with a debt on par with a brand new, zero-miles car — you’ve failed your new wife as a responsible provider.

    Oh, wait. The father of the bride is supposed to pay for all of that, right?”

  67. @imanobody

    As far as I can recall, DiCaprio had a lot of classic beta traits: he acted totally intimidated and inexperienced when he actually saw Kate Winslet naked; he was sensitive; and finally, he sacrificed everything to save her life while asking nothing in return and urging her to marry someone else. Meanwhile, her fiance, even apart from his wealth, acted more masculine overall. He was dominant, commanding, even violent at times.

  68. Sojourner says:

    Just noticed that IS Katy Perry in the Gym Class Heroes video. Note that McCoy was also in her I Kissed A Girl video back when (think that was near the end of the relationship. She got big, he didn’t as much, she moved on. Surprise Surprise.) I still am amazed at the fact that Perry was once a Christian singer and one of my favorite POD songs includes her voice on background vocals. But then, those PKs, I tell ya!

  69. Thucydides says:

    @ TFH
    > Seasteading, the ultimate MGTOW, will provide many alternatives to the cartel of nation-states.

    Not to be facetious, but what about pirates or other hostile forces?

  70. Pingback: Jack Dawson game. « Haley's Halo

  71. BBTP says:

    “Roma and Romani are the correct terms. Some debate whether ‘Romania’ as a country was named after them, since a lot of them were concentrated there for a while.”

    Who “debates” this? Fools, I suppose, who don’t know how to use Google and Wikipedia, but love making up naive folk etymologies about countries about whose languages they are blissfully ignorant. See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Name_of_Romania: “The name of Romania (România) comes from the Romanian Român, which is a derivative of the Latin adjective Romanus (Roman).”

    By the way, Romanians correctly believe that Gypsies are generally scummy low-lifes who live only by theft. This view is universal in any area where Gypsies are known by their actions rather than by movies and books. For instance, the Italians had anti-Gypsy riots in 2008, after a Gypsy vagabond raped and murdered an admiral’s wife; the Hungarians regularly expel and harass Gypsies malingering around Hungarian villages; even the Finns can’t cope well with their tiny Gypsy minority.

  72. umslopogaas says:

    @vitabenedicta:

    As far as I can recall, DiCaprio had a lot of classic beta traits: he acted totally intimidated and inexperienced when he actually saw Kate Winslet naked; he was sensitive; and finally, he sacrificed everything to save her life while asking nothing in return and urging her to marry someone else. Meanwhile, her fiance, even apart from his wealth, acted more masculine overall. He was dominant, commanding, even violent at times.

    You are, imo, correct in your analysis. However bear in mind that Titanic is a movie, and worse a Hollywood movie. Hollywood movies are notorious for how shmaltzily unrealistic they oftentimes portray the world and especially romance. A common theme, for instance, is the shy, gentle, dweeby nice guy getting the girl…saving her from the evil jock & douchbag (aka Biff Tannen).

    From “Back to the Future” to “My Girl” to “Patch” to “Hitch” this theme is repeated time and again. It doesn’t correspond to reality.

    Vis a vis ‘Titanic’: in reality Rose DeWitt Bukater would have found Jack Dawson mildly entertaining. She might even have felt some initial attraction because of his unconventional, free spirit and daring. However, once Caledon Hockley (her rich douchebag fiance) mocked and put him down (as happens in the movie) she would have been repulsed by Jack’s weak response. She might even have been angry at Hockley for behaving like an ass and dominating Jack (and also her)…but her gina would have betrayed her by tingling.

    Add to that her being accustomed to wealth and splendour and Jack being poor as a pauper (does not bode well for her hypergamous instincts) and my money would be on her marrying the meatheaded Hockley. Sure she would fantasize and whine about her great “sacrifices” and a life of tedium…but if she did have an affair on the side it would be with some smoothtalking, greasy gardner/butler whatever…who worked at her mansion…rather than some rather average schlub from the Hickaway Falls.

  73. Höllenhund says:

    Women loved Titanic precisely because Jack died:

  74. Legion says:

    Thucydides says:
    January 5, 2012 at 12:34 pm

    It will be a man’s city, so even the 5 year olds will have automatic weapons.

    I don’t think a floating city state could withstand many attacks by the larger nations. Maybe if they did banking on an international scale it could help. Getting their finances to defend itself may be tricky.

  75. Eric says:

    Deti:
    I don’t think it matters one way or another what particular archetype this guy supposedly fits. The fact is that Ms. Princess (and this true of most women) felt entitled to whatever she thought she could get out him; and now she’s getting revenge for him not delivering. I really don’t think it makes any difference at all to women what kind of men they choose, since they are only thinking of their own wants/needs and it’s up to the man (in their minds) to live up to whatever ideals the women have.

    I would be willing to be that if this guy she ‘loved’ so much actually reciprocated with some genuine feeling she would have thrown aside like a sack of garbage, jumped straight to bed with the first random lowlife she could find; and would now be singing or giving interviews about she avoided a ‘creepy dangerous guy’ instead of ‘the one that got away’. Honestly, have you ever known most women to do otherwise? It’s all a power-trip to them and the men are irrelevant.

    Kurt Koffka published once the results of an experiment he and others did on the relationship between anger and narcissicism. He pointed out that when the narcissist’s goals are frustrated— since their own ego is isolated as opposed to a component of a larger social field—they perceive the entire social field as a hostile one. This is exactly the typical female attitude towards the entire male gender.

  76. Dalrock says:

    All of this talk of Titanic reminds me of another period-chickcrack-isn’t-treachery-romantic movie which came out a few years later, Pearl Harbor. Actually, I haven’t seen either one, but I enjoyed the musical salute to Pearl Harbor in Team America, World Police:

  77. Opus says:

    @Eric

    Excellent – just wanted to say, also,

    On that film, the joke over here used to be that it was Kate Winslet who sank the Titanic (too faaaaat).

    And speaking of Winslet, (seeing we are talking real relationships) she married a Cameraman, – lived out on that little Thames Island near Kingston – but it did not last long. How could it – women are just not attracted to men who are perceived to be less wealthy and powerful than they.

  78. Ecstasy says:

    If the 5 minutes of Alpha is truly that powerful, what happens when the girl meets another Alpha male later on in life. Is she still completely and irreversibly mentally fucked up by the first one?

    I do feel sorry for the beta males who become providers while their woman is pining for some dude she snubbed years ago.

  79. Eric says:

    Opus:
    ‘Women aren’t attracted to men who are perceived to be less wealthy and powerful than they are.’

    That certainly doesn’t stop them from being attracted to limp-wristed metrosexuals or street-level thugs, though. I’d say most likely Katie-Poo went for the cameraman because she thought he could be dominated easily; and then divorced him when he tried to act like a real husband!

    It would be interesting to hear what other men have to say on this topic, though. In my own experience, I’ve never seen women leaving men for ‘bigger better deals’ or ‘handsome princes’ but always for the lowest, scummiest males they could find!

  80. Badger says:

    Katy Perry also had a song called “Thinking of You” about pining for a lost lover whilst dating other men. I obliquely referenced it in a post. http://badgerhut.wordpress.com/2011/05/06/moving-on-and-when-to-do-it/

  81. Anonymous says:

    This is horribly off-topic, but I disagree with a lot of the comments being made about Titanic. Jack was actually the alpha.

    1) He negs Rose when he first meets her(“you seem more like an ‘in-doors’ girl)
    2) Willingness to walk away – after he saves Rose’s life, he is aloof and she must seek him out
    3) Social proof through the pictures in his sketchbook(he meets lots of sexy women in brothels) – and the party he takes her to
    4) Plays it cool when he paints Rose nude
    5) also remember, Rose never knows he was going to die for her – Cal lies and claims that he bought Jack a place on one of the rescue boats

    Jack dying at the end, is the equivalent of Katy Perry’s imaginary boyfriend dying tragically – it lets women fall in love with an alpha without painting the reality of being in a LTR with one.

    Cal, on the other hand, was beta. He was obsessed with Rose, tried to micromanage her, was aroused into jealousy by her interactions, and did not allow her to chase him. He also, of course, sought to win her affection through money, and not through Game.

    There seems to be a lot of misunderstanding about Game – specificaly, people grossly inflate the idea that “chicks dig assholes”. Chicks dig guys who demonstrate higher value – this is not synonymous with being an asshole. You can be an asshole – as Cal was – and yet not demonstrate higher value. Cal was a raging hardon but at the same time incredibly beta. Conversely, you can be essentially a decent person – like Jack – and yet still demonstrate higher value through social proof and making the girl chase you.

  82. Höllenhund says:

    “Cal, on the other hand, was beta. He was obsessed with Rose, tried to micromanage her, was aroused into jealousy by her interactions, and did not allow her to chase him. He also, of course, sought to win her affection through money, and not through Game.”

    Indeed. He was violent and decisive, but in a beta way.

  83. imnobody says:

    @vitabenedicta.

    I was going to answer, but Anonymous above did it better than I could with my broken English. People misunderstand the concepts of “alpha” and “beta”.

  84. Opus says:

    @Eric

    I forgot about that, for it is true that women ditch men for low lifes; sometimes they go up and sometimes down or in some cases horizontally – one of my exes ditched me for a somewhat butch woman.😦 Now that is really humiliating.

    I checked up on Winslett however, and see that she remarried and to Oscar Winning Actor/ Director Sam Mendes – so that is definitely more appropriate, but she has now divorced him. I predict a slow decline.

  85. Eric says:

    Opus:
    You’re not the only one who’s had that kind of humiliation. A client of mine was once dating two women; both dumped him and became lesbos together. And people wonder why the ‘real men’ don’t bother with Amerobitches anymore? LOL. They wonder where the real men have gone— they mostly can’t find them because they aren’t looking for them.

    Actually, the real men have either gone MGTOW or are taking extended vacations in other countries looking for the real women!

  86. David F. says:

    @Anonymous 2:02am

    I think you gave the most accurate and succinct analysis of *Titanic* and how it relates to game that I’ve yet read. Thanks for settling that issue so clearly.

  87. Anonymous says:

    Thanks David F.🙂

  88. Anonymous says:

    “You are, imo, correct in your analysis. However bear in mind that Titanic is a movie, and worse a Hollywood movie. Hollywood movies are notorious for how shmaltzily unrealistic they oftentimes portray the world and especially romance. A common theme, for instance, is the shy, gentle, dweeby nice guy getting the girl…saving her from the evil jock & douchbag (aka Biff Tannen).”

    Titanic would never have been popular with women if Jack was a beta😛

  89. alcestiseshtemoa says:

    I never completely undertood Titanic. When I saw it when I was younger I was pinning for Cal. I didn’t feel so emotional about Jack’s death either and I thought Rose was being an idiot. When the Captain went down with his ship that made me sad -> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vp–AlWBrU

  90. alcestiseshtemoa says:

    Titanic would never have been popular with women if Jack was a beta

    I must be odd then because I always liked Cal better and felt admiration for Captain Smith and Thomas Andrews. If you take away the horrible and sentimental disaster of the Titanic sinking into the ocean, this movie would be another run of the mill “girl going wild and rebelling” chick flick. I really think the Titanic disaster angle gave it a huge, huge boost -> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vz4xHW8_6k

    I don’t know about others but that’s how I feel.

  91. van Rooinek says:

    Pirates would not gain much from attacking a Seastead…

    There’s always money. And women.

    …plus there aren’t pirates off the California coast.

    Yet. Give it time.

  92. LR says:

    @doesn’t matter-You mean number of single males per less than 99 females? Between age 25 and 54, there are more 179-105 males per 99 or less females on average and there’s tougher competition between males in those age groups than in the under 25 age group. And that’s when most males are bachelors while women are already married with children. Hey, most families in the world want to have a son versus a daughter. And many women are more likely to be victims of violence, compared to men.

  93. Anonymous Reader says:

    LR
    @doesn’t matter-You mean number of single males per less than 99 females? Between age 25 and 54, there are more 179-105 males per 99 or less females on average

    How do you know that to be true?

    and there’s tougher competition between males in those age groups than in the under 25 age group.

    Really? What do you base that claim on?

    And that’s when most males are bachelors while women are already married with children.

    Except for the married men and the single mothers, of course.

    Hey, most families in the world want to have a son versus a daughter.

    Except in the US, where the preference now is for girls.

    And many women are more likely to be victims of violence, compared to men.

    That’s not what the FBI says. Or history.

    Thanks for dropping by.

  94. Pingback: Rules of the road for fornication. | Dalrock

  95. Megalodon says:

    I hate to subject you to more popular culture, but this other music video seems apt. It depicts Avril Lavigne having a feckless time and inflicting damage, while a hapless boyfriend chases and cleans up after her. And after it’s all over, he takes her back.

  96. jane says:

    Sorry did you say “This is also why you need to take your potential wife’s past sexual history very seriously.” What era are you currently writing from?

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